No.
You are not going.
Are you crazy?
You are such an extremest.
You have such a good thing going do NOT walk away from that.
What are you going to do about your business?
You make a lot of money.
What will you do when you get back?
What countries?
Do you know what they do to girls out there?
Why not go down to Mexico for a weekend and get it out of your system?
That last one is actually really funny to me.
The funny part is that I have never served in another county. I have served and I have been in other countries but never both at the same time. So to leave on a missions trip for almost a year non stop, you would think the first step would be to go on a few short term missions trips to get acclimated. That is always something I was planning on, but then I heard about the World Race.
I could not stop thinking about spending my days with children from all over the world. I could see myself loving them, playing with them, praying with them, teaching them about Gods love for them and showing them hope in Christ. There are tears coming down my face as I write this. I know it is so much more than that and yes of course it is going to be hard BUT life is hard already.
Why not put my hard work towards bettering these lives then trying to better my own?
I have been self-centered in trying to better my own life all along. And let me tell you, it does nothing for the kingdom of GOD.
Matthew 16:25
For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.
BEFORE I DECIDED:
I was STRUGGLING with whether or not I should go. I felt a battle, no, a full on WAR of mind and soul that was tearing me apart from the inside out. I could no longer look at my life the same. I felt like a different person already. The things that used to matter to me I had no care for. The American dream that was built up in my mind had collapsed like the twin towers—there was nothing left and I could not go back. My mind could not rebuild what had once been: it was ground zero.
In hindsight, I can see God has been preparing me for this journey for a long time.
I wondered if I was losing it.
I struggled with how to plan for it and how to set up my life when I got back and how to…
But, we are NOT promised tomorrow.
AND WHY DID I EVER THINK I HAD ALL THIS TIME?
I had this sense of URGENCY surging through me
The time is NOW
I HAVE to do something
and
I have to do something RADICAL
Long story short:
If I were told I had one more year to live this is what I would spend my life doing
I SURRENDER
That is what it came to
Lord your will be done not mine
So here I am
Isaiah 6:8
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”
And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”
O C T O B E R 2 0 2 0
COSTA RICA
PANAMA
ECUADOR
PERU
CHILE
JAPAN
CHINA
VIETNAM
CAMBODIA
MALAYSIA
INDONESIA
