hi!! towards the end of last week, I started feeling pretty sick, with a persistent fever and headache that wouldn’t go away. I went to the clinic on Monday and tested for dengue fever. If you’ve ever heard it, you’ve probably heard of the severe cases, where people are rushed to the hospital immediately and death isn’t out of question. That was not the case for me, praise the Lord! but I did have a fever for five days, and a headache for over a week, along with other symptoms such as coughing, nausea, dizziness, and general pain throughout my muscles and body. although dengue is common in the area I am currently living in, there is no cure, it simply runs its course and your body fights it with lots of rest, Tylenol, and hydration. and between the lack of wifi and the lack of energy, I’ve had the gift this week of spending hours with the Lord, reading scripture, praying, watercoloring, listening to music, and napping. So I’d love to share a few of the lessons I’ve learned while having dengue fever::
- Jesus is worthy of all praise! my squad often sings a song with a verse that goes “You are worthy of all praise, we will fight, we will fight for Your fame” and if we truly believe He is worthy of all our praise, then let’s act like it!! and what I’m learning is that we think we do, when we don’t. of course, sometimes we truly do. there are moments where our worship is most genuine and pure. don’t discredit those moments! but I think more often than not, we say Jesus is worthy of all praise, and yet we still praise reputation. we still praise aesthetic. we still praise loyalty. we still praise relationships. All things that are so good, gifts from the Good Giver (James 1:17) and yet none are worthy of our praise like Jesus is (Revelation 5:12).
- Doing things for any reason besides the praise we just talked about, is a waste of doing something. Sounds harsh I know, but isn’t this what Jesus said? “And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him” (Colossians 3:17) “He gave a decree and it shall not pass away” (Psalm 148:6) “Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away” (Luke 21:33) if Jesus is telling us that His words are the only thing that remain, and it’s His Word that tells us to work for the Lord and not men, then than means working for any reason besides God isn’t worth it. it’s a waste. Making a comment that furthers your reputation, not His, isn’t worth it. Choosing a movie that satisfies your desires, not His will, isn’t worth it. Doing just enough to get by, to appease your tiredness, instead of working to let His power reign in your weakness, isn’t worth it. It’s not the movie that’s bad, and the comment probably isn’t hurting anyone’s feelings. Except it’s making you the god of your own life. and that is never worth it.
- Jesus is worthy of all surrender! “So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:33) renounce everything?? yes, I’m (still) learning that means giving the Lord control of every single thing. surrendering it all back to Him. everything from emotions to plans to family to health. and this surrender isn’t because Jesus desires bad things for us. He actually has our best in mind! (Jeremiah 32:40-41) so surrender, however hard it may be, is an avenue for the Lord to show Himself as best.
- Surrender doesn’t mean the Lord is taking it away! He wants us to surrender all. Even if we just surrendered all our emotions, we’d be surrendering both joy and sadness, both heartache and hope, both chaos and peace. and surrender doesn’t mean losing the good with the bad, but simply giving the Father control of both. I think it becomes easy in Christian communities to speak of surrender in a way that only begs the surrender of hard things. because His burden is light. and it is! but sometimes by giving Him only the hard things, lightening your own burden, I think we forget how strongly we are clinging to what feels light to carry in our own hands. we forget to also give him our “good” emotions. so let’s start giving Him our joy, or hope, and our peace too – because it really just gives us opportunity to experience His joy, His hope, and His peace. and that’s eternal. so why not surrender all of it?
And overall I’m learning that all this surrender, all the seeking His praise and not my own – it’s not a chore or a burden on me, but it’s the path to freeing rest! because working for His glory doesn’t mean getting a certain amount done each day. and surrendering all of it means giving the Lord control even of time. and I think we all know, when we’re sick, we don’t get as much done. we don’t have as much energy to do the things we’re used to doing. and for most of us, the people around us are actually encouraging us to slow down and rest in stillness for a little bit. So if the Lord used this time for me, this week of time moving really slowly, to teach me what working and living for Him looks like, then I guarantee you He doesn’t judge your work based on how much you’re getting done. He doesn’t see your heart based on how many things you’ve chosen to do or not do that day. He wants your heart! In the busiest days and the slowest! because His burden IS light, and His control IS freeing!
So dengue fever, thanks for teaching me what freedom looks like!
with love (and a little cough),
Rachel <33
