A whole year ago I was returning from Kenya.
I came back in awe of the life-changing trip that I had not expected. The verse that I went into the trip focusing on was, “for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self control.”-2nd Timothy 1:7. I had no idea how God would reach me on each of those aspects : power, love, and self control.
I had never been on a missions trip before, but I knew that I wanted God to kind of “break me” while I was there. I was too comfortable in my own life and my own self-pity. I wanted God to make me feel for the people….for many years before I had learned how to “turn off” my emotions when I didn’t want to feel sad or upset about what was going on in my life.
I felt so much during my two weeks in Kenya….
My heart broke over and over for the children we saw, the people, and the families.
The first day we went out into a village to evangelize. Never having gone evangelizing before, I had a freak out moment where I didn’t feel adequate or adept to go and share my faith and Christ to strangers. As we walked along in the village. children started to follow us and other people. We came to a one-room house and all piled in. As many as could fit were in the house with children on laps and sitting not he ground and some people standing. They filled this small house to hear us “Muzungus” (white people) tell them about Jesus.
After our translator spoke to them, he asked if one of the three of us would like to share our testimony. Someone on my team said, “I think Chloe wants to share hers.” So many thoughts one through my mind, but an instant later peace filled the spot of nervousness, anxiety, and the feeling that I was inadequate. I shared my testimony and after I felt so full of joy and in confident in my faith. An older woman commented that she didn’t know that mzungus from America have problems and struggle like they do. Later that same day I led a girl named Elizabeth in the sinners prayer to accept Christ.
All of these things were God’s way of ensuring me of his love and that if he calls us to minister to others he will work through us. We are a vessel of his love and are called to plant the seed. That day I started to feel many things, but God had a bigger picture in mind like he always does.
That same day was the day my parents became officially divorced. Jesus showed me over and over again that he surrounds me with his peace and love. I could not have been in a better place or surrounded by better people that day. I had a built in support group that was amazing. Jesus showed me that I am worthy and capable to do anything and go through anything with him.
