Despite the fact that my body has had times of being weak and my soul feeling tired through the past month or so, God has been teaching my heart so much through it. Concepts such as
-being comfortably uncomfortable
-continuing to be filled with more of God’s love
-& witnessing some of the most pure smiles & precious moments
are all collectively what God has continually used to fill my heart up again & again.
PSA: my words won’t even come near to being able to fully describe this heart-transforming experience. So please bare with me as I try to depict a glimpse of it. (Also, the posting of this blog is slightly delayed due to complications with WiFi etc., but a more recent update on ministry, life and what has been going on in Ecuador will hopefully be posted soon as well!)
During the month of September, I had a really unique opportunity to serve a special needs organization here in Ecuador called Camp Hope. Monday through Friday, me and my team would start out the day with our 25-30 minute walk to our destination. From 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., we would serve this ministry by assisting the nurses and staff with helping meet the needs of the most precious children, teens and adults who are apart of the program. Preparing food and cleaning dishes in the kitchen for everyone, spoon-feeding hungry mouths, brushing teeth, changing diapers, making crafts, helping with various kinds therapy and just simply loving these people was what we did day in and day out.
I have personally never worked with special needs children and adults to this capacity before until this past month. With that, you could say I was “comfortably uncomfortable.” I often felt unqualified and didn’t know exactly how to go about each individuals different needs.
-How do I get through the language barrier?
-How do I talk to someone who can’t talk back?
-What if I can’t do the feeding or changing correctly?
-What if I accidentally do something wrong or mess up?
These were just a few of the questions that lurked through my mind. Even though I was in this continual state of being slightly uncomfortable with the unknowns of each day, God was in the midst of it teaching me all the cool things He can do outside of my comfort zone. I was reminded that HIS strength is made perfect in my weaknesses. Giving Him the space to to fill all my inadequacies is so much better then me trying to be enough on my own. Living outside of one’s own comfort zone can seem daunting, but wow, I grew more, had more fun and experienced what is to have the heart be filled with a greater love- God’s love.
Working with those who either can’t walk, talk, or function normally in almost any capacity, is incredibly humbling. It’s an extraordinary way for God to expand the depths of one’s heart to experience a deeper love for Him and others. Whether it was me speaking encouraging words to a child who couldn’t utter a single word or taking the time to sit next to or hold one’s hand who couldn’t move a muscle on their own, these were the times where God was filling my heart with more and more of His love. I almost can’t even explain it into words. It’s a love that knows no bounds or borders, not even a disability or flaw.
Some of my most favorite parts of it all has been all the smiles, all the laughs, all the hugs, all the baby spit-up (okay maybe not my favorite part, but definitely won’t forget it haha) all the wheel-chair strolls, and all the cute and silly sounds/words uttered on the daily. For instance, one day I was taking care of a young boy in a wheel chair and I got to take him on a stroll around the park. He couldn’t speak, but kept turning around to look at me in his oval-shaped glasses, his cheeky smile and a big thumbs-up for how excited he was to just go on a little ride. The child-like, innocence of each soul there was so refreshing and altogether inspiring. Goodness gracious, I wish I could better explain more of how my heart has both widen and deepened because of all of this. Biblical child-likeness is a beautiful thing.
Long story short, regardless of any highs and lows of this first portion of our journey abroad, God has both opened up my eyes and softened my heart in ways I never thought were possible. I am thankful and changed for the better. As more of myself was lost (my comfort, normalcy etc.), I gained more of Christ and His love for His amazing and special people. More of Him and less of me… this is how it ought to be.
Forever thankful for Camp Hope and all who make it a place of hope and happiness. I am so sad to end our time there in this season, but so excited to take all the memories and all that I have learned into the next season and into the rest of my life!!!
