Hey all, I’m back to writing again and on a plane to Chicago, then to Korea, then to Cambodia. I’m really leaving, woah. I made it to training camp and these three and a half days have been the fastest and longest days I’ve ever had. I’ve left family and friends, made new friends (soon to be family), eaten meals with my hands, seen the Lord heal someone, had a great talk with the Holy Spirit, and learned how to rest in God’s presence. The Lord is leading and he’ll provide, and I know that’s a fact even when it means sleeping on the airport floor.
I left Florida on Jan. 23, and saying goodbye was, though not the hardest thing I’ve done, very stinkin’ hard. Leaving a family like the one I have back home is like leaving pieces of my heart. My friends are like sisters and brothers and living life without all of them is going to be the strangest part of this trip. I know my family and friends are reading this so just remember that I miss you all (especially you, Lydia). Once I got to the Atlanta airport, I met up with a great friend from back home and fellow World Racer, Nicole, for our last American Starbucks and we found the huge group of young adults with packs and pillows strewn across the airport benches. Who else could they be but World Racers? Of course they invited us in and started introductions. My small talk capabilities were tested as more and more people joined our group, each one very excited and ready to start our journey, the two hour drive to training camp.
In my mind, training camp would be easy, practically a breeze, and I’d have no trouble making friends and learning about ministry and culture. Well, that wasn’t reality. The devil has really been speaking lies to me and trying to mess with God’s plan. He’s been telling me I am alone and I’m not ready for this and there’s no way I possibly could be. But god. Isn’t that a beautiful phrase, “But God.” God is so powerful, darkness has no choice but to run and hide. He’s been kicking the devil’s butt so far and that isn’t going to change. I’ve had so many tender moments with my Father these past couple days and each time he addresses another lie I had started believing by replacing it with His truth. When you call on the Lord, he shows up. He doesn’t leave his precious children stranded or defenseless, we are called to walk in his power. One way he showed his presence to me was showing me how to rest. We were given time to pray and hear God anyway he wanted to speak. I sat there, wondering how he would speak to me so I just closed my eyes and started talking to him. It wasn’t the kind of conversation where you talk the whole time, we just sat in silence together for much of it. I saw beautiful colors and just felt so much peace in that time dwelling in the presence of my Saviour. That 10 minutes or so of rest was exactly what I needed in the overwhelming chaos of the past couple days.
Did you know that the Lord is worthy of everything? And not everything like your church life or the percentage you tithe. Everything like your closest friend, your feelings of insecurity and fear, every moment of your day being surrendered to his purpose. This theme has been so prevalent this week and honestly this past month, God’s really showing me something big. He has used worship time to encourage me to sit in awe of him and give him the glory he deserves especially with the song Worth Of It All which goes like this,
It’s been a difficult thing for me to release control over my life and relationships just because of who I am but the Lord is prompting me to daily surrender to him. I am confident he knows best and is continuously leading me on his path so of course I should be following him not trying to create my own path. This week has been a lot of ongoing release of my control over my life and though I’m nowhere near the point I need to be at, God is giving me little steps to take to get closer to him and further from the path I try to follow, which I am so thankful for. A verse he’s given me to remind me to stick to his guidance even when I am unsteady is Psalms 77:19-20, “Your way was through the sea, your path through the great waters, yet your footprints we’re unseen. You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.” It’s saying that although God’s path may lead through difficulties and you may not see how he’s beside you, he continues to lead you like a shepherd leads his flock. I’m so thankful that even while I’m a messed up person, God follows through with his promises, they are always yes and amen.
So as my squad and I head out, we need you to be praying. We are going to do the Lord’s work and the devil does not like that, he’s going to be attacking on all sides. Our squad needs to be unified as one body in Christ, filled with his love, and willing to serve for his glory. We know that everything that happens is God’s will and we need to trust him always. I’m reminded of the verses in James, “Count it all joy, my brothers and sisters, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have it’s full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” Please come alongside us in prayer and encouragement, you can find my team’s blogs on the side of my blog home. Check out their posts, comment, get in contact, these are wonderful women of God sent to do his work however they can. Thank you again for your support and may the Lord bless you this week.
