Hi friends and family!
God has been putting one word on my heart lately: joy. I want to explain what this word has meant for me since I started the race. This is more personal than usual and honestly a little all over the place but stick with me!
Prophecy is something that was talked about a lot during training camp. Personally, I’ve had zero experience in anything relating to prophecy. One of the exercises we did was a prophecy circle and so my team and I sat in a circle with our eyes closed, and our team leader tapped one of us. The person who was tapped was the person that was being spoken about but none of us knew who the person was. We would have to sit and listen to what God wanted us to say to this person for Him. We would spend about 10 minutes just listening to what God was saying to us about someone in the circle and share what He was saying. This was brand new for a lot of my teammates and I, but we had lots of chances to test the waters at training camp and on the race. At first, I struggled a lot with trying to decipher what was one of my thoughts and what He was telling me.
During training camp, I was picked for one of the prophecy circles. A lot of the people on my team said things along the lines of “trust in Him” and “let go”. Almost everyone in the circle said that they could sense lots of anxiety and needing to fully surrender to God. Keep in mind that I had known these people for less than 48 hours! I was putting on a brave face when meeting everyone because I didn’t want anyone to see how anxious I was. This was really overwhelming to hear because the same few ideas were being said over and over again from God speaking through my teammates, and they didn’t know anything about me at the time.
Committing to come on this trip was me obeying God’s calling. I was terrified and filled with so much anxiety and fear. I let these things consume my every thought and it was exhausting. The prophecy circle was God telling me to let go and fully trust in Him! During worship one night, I fully surrendered all of my anxiety and fear and God left me with so much peace. He kept reminding me over and over again that He is good, He is with me, and He is going to use me in ways I couldn’t even imagine.
Fast forward to the past few days, where God is revealing Himself to me in so many ways. He is constantly reminding me of how much He loves me and how He wants to drastically change my life, as well as the lives of everyone on my team. Today we had another prophecy circle, but instead of my leader tapping one of us on the shoulder, a name was picked out of a hat that would be revealed at the end. For this round, the first thing that was said was that they see colorful flowers, could sense an overwhelming amount of joy and happiness, and an abundance of growth. Another person said they see a garden with tall flowers and that someone is frolicking and dancing with joy because they see the goodness of God. Not a lot of people know this about me, but flowers carry so much significance to me because of how they represent growth. God was literally telling me that this was all for me and then at the end of the round I wasn’t surprised when it was my name that was pulled out of the hat.
God has fully stripped away my anxiety and fear and has broken down so many walls in my heart. He is opening my eyes to so many beautiful moments, people, and experiences. I feel like I’m a sponge just wanting to soak up so much knowledge and experiences in my time here. Words can’t even begin to express how my heart has been changed since I started the race. My days are filled with joy and peace and I honestly wouldn’t want to be anywhere else but where He has placed me. God is constantly growing me and teaching me so much about Him and his good heart. It is only by God’s grace that he has changed a once anxious heart, scared of the future and dwelling on the past, to a heart of obedience and joy.
Thank you so much for your prayers and support!! If you ever have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask! <3
Blessings,
Natalie
