Hey guys!!!! Im so sorry that I’m awful at blogging but now that Im home, I’ve had so much time to catch up on everything. So I’m going to use this as a way to update y’all but also try to write out my thoughts and help me understand what the heck jus happened!!!
You may or may not know that my squad, as well as all the other gap year, 11n11 and semesters squads running through AIM we’re all sent home from the field a few weeks ago.
My team (and half of halal) found this news out on Sunday, March 15th. Pretty much, the night before we found out we had stayed up later than usual, jus chatting and helping me plan for this sermon I offered to give at church that next morning. Well, unexpectedly things changed because we woke up to pouring rain… and in Cambodia (and prolly a lot of other countries too) when it rains things get postponed/ cancelled. So we were just hanging out until our Pastor came to hopefully (try to) tell us what the plan was. While we were waiting, Braeden gets a call on her baby phone (all team leaders/ logistics people, get a phone with a SIM card so they can stay in touch with our squad leaders) from Marissa telling her to check her email. As Braeden tries to set up Courtlan and Ariel’s hot spot, the rest of us eagerly wait. At this point we all think we know what’s about to be said because we found out the other night that 1 gap year squad had already been sent home that was living in Africa. But meanwhile, we jus danced it out so we wouldn’t cry to soon. Then b-dog read the email and it was confirmed, we were going home. Most of us were jus shook, we didn’t know how to feel. Although we still didn’t know exactly when though…a day? 2 days? A week? Not long after we read the email Marissa calls back and tells us they’re coming in about 2 hours to take us to Siem Reap to meet the rest of our squad. So, there we were with a 2 hours notice to pack up all of our stuff (plus some other girls that went to Siem Reap for the weekend) and not really having any time to process anything. We all immediately hopped on Courtlan and Ariel’s hot spot to call home and our friends to tell them what was happening. And as soon as we knew it we were heading to the airport at like 3 in the morning the next day… within 48 hours on March 17th we were back in the states. People began leaving straight from LAX, and it got real. These people I had just called family for the past 7 months were beginning to leave just like that. Our organization got us a hotel for the night so we all had time to book a flight and get home. (or where ever we were headed) So I spent the next couple hours eating Chick-Fil-A and saying bye to everyone. I couldn’t sleep so Christine and I just put some coffee in our system and chatted until I had to leave for the airport around 4 in the morning. And somehow, now I find myself sitting on my bed, in my house, typing this out. It still doesn’t feel real.
I still have yet to sit down and process through everythingggg, but I think thats okay. I like how my good pal Julia Herrmann put it. She said “Being home it kind of feels like I was gone forever yet no time at all. Like if I didn’t fight to remember the last seven months, it could certainly feel like they never happened. That is the weirdest feeling of them all. Feeling like the race was not real, but a mere dream.” (Good stuff Juj)
It’s weird to come “home” to a place thats so immensely different from how I left it, making “home” seem almost unfamiliar, and not to be ironic, but in a way, foreign. In these last 7 months my idea of “home” drastically changed along with my view of family. My home was no longer a building but instead it was where ever my family was, and my family no longer confined to blood, it was rather the body of Christ. My church.
It’s sad to now look through my camera roll and see all the memories I made in this past year but even more sad to now only be able to see my sisters through a screen.
The World Race has been a blessing even though it looked so much different than I could have ever imagined. It didn’t feel like a 7 month long “mission trip”, it just felt like life.
So I guess this is the end of my World Race journey… but it isn’t the end of GOD’S journey for my life and I couldn’t be more grateful that this doesn’t have to end. I’m continuing to say YES to whatever it is the Lord has ahead of me no matter how hard it might be.
I also want to say THANK YOU to everyone who has read my blogs and has supported me through this whole thing either financially or prayerfully, it truly means so much to me.
Don’t you worry though, more blogs are to come soon, so stay tuned!!
