The night before leaving, or more specifically, 5 hours before our scheduled departure time, I was up awake in tears and on the phone with my mom due to some recent events at TC. I had been having a hard day and even harder night. My doubt was kicking in. I felt as if my heart was being tugged in the direction of turning around and going home. I was having the hardest time deciphering the message and determining if it was from God or the enemy. The past few days, God had been speaking to me through images and so with an anxious mind I went to sleep in hopes he would send me a message telling me what to do. I prayed until I fell asleep and heard only silence. When morning came and we loaded the vans to travel to the Atlanta Airport, I put in my headphones to listen to worship music still hoping I would be given a clear sign. Still nothing… After another phone call with my mom, we decided that I would stay. We came to a very true and eye opening conclusion.
I am a servant of God, not the organization I am traveling with. I need to hold my head high and serve the God I came to serve and be the servant I am called to be even if the organization I’m serving through doesn’t act in a Godly manner. I know who my God is and how he loves and that is the God I am here to follow and serve.
My parents taught me to love, because Got loves us. They taught me not to judge, because God is the only one who can judge.
So, I will go about my mission trip. I am serving my God, not an organization.
