Welcome to my World Race blog! My goal for this space is to illustrate how God is working in this season of my life and to be transparent in sharing these experiences to come with you. I’m beyond excited for this opportunity and incredibly thankful for everyone who has taken the time to stop by on this site! I’ll begin with how I even got here to be apart of the Word Race and give a little background of myself and my walk with the Lord.
Back in 2015 I found myself in the darkest depression of my life after my career with the Navy didn’t pan out as I planned, relationships had been burned and my health quickly took a nosedive. I was spiraling out of control and was consumed by anger and fear. I swallowed every lie the enemy told me to where I no longer knew what the Truth looked like. During this time I had severe chest pains and intense heart palpitations later to be diagnosed with Graves disease. I was also navigating some serious PTSD from violent events that took place that previous year. Growing up in the Bible belt I have always believed in Jesus but at this point I was convinced I was out of His reach and far too messy for Him. One day I asked myself “if I really believed in God then why don’t I give Him a chance?” So I wrote all the promises of God from the bible on my wall to read everyday and downloaded worship music and sermons onto my ipod and listened to that as I walked three times a day. Within no time I started to learn about the true nature of God and discovered I had been viewing Him all wrong like He was some militant figure ready to punish. One night I came across a sermon online and had an encounter with Jesus that forever changed my life. I clearly heard Him say “Hannah I don’t condemn you, and if I don’t who can?” For the first time it dropped from my head to my heart that He loves me. I understood what grace meant. I cried for three days. I also fully surrendered my life to Him. As I walked with the Lord my healing was a process. Eventually the chest pain ceased and the doctors couldn’t find any trace of Graves disease.
With my new found freedom I was looking for ways to be completely obedient. I joined a run group at church and met a girl who had went on the World Race. After she shared with me her experiences I did some research and immediately fell in love. Rugged and radical, an 11 month missions trip to 11 different countries being the hands and feet of Jesus to the ‘least of these.’ This fit my personality seamlessly! I was made for something like this! However, life got in the way and excuses filled my mind so I put any ideas of the Race on the shelf to look at and occasionally think about. I felt inexperienced, couldn’t fathom the cost and it wasn’t a variable I could control. Fast forward a few years, I spent my time in youth ministry as a student mentor and took students on missions trip through younglife expeditions and other forms discipleship trips.
It was in 2018 during a missions trip to Kenya that the Lord brought the word lukewarm to my heart. I didn’t understand what that meant and ever since I became a youth leader I questioned my motives for being in ministry. I talked to my mentor about it and he told me to listen to a sermon by Francis Chan which I forgot about when we got back home in the states. A few months later the world around me fell apart. A relationship I held onto so tightly dissolved instantaneously. Control slipped through my hands like sand. I was left heartbroken and feeling lost. I went to the Lord with this and the word lukewarm resurfaced. He revealed to me how much of an idol I made that relationship and how my motives were divided. I was repulsed by the fact that the passion I first had for Jesus became dimmed down and was overcast by things of this world. I asked the Lord “do whatever it takes to get me on fire for You.” Truly it was out of love for Him to strip away things and people to reveal true treasure. Take it all away. Strip it all away. I repented until my prayer looked like Psalm 27:4.
During this time I was enrolled in fire school to become a firefighter. The idea of the World Race came back and resonated with me. I spent hours reading former racers stories and was so captivated that I dropped out of the fire academy and applied for the Race. I heard back from admissions and was told they couldn’t offer me a spot and to reapply next year which is entirely another blog in itself because this one has already become a novel but God did open the door this year for August and now I’m here! I’m a few months away from launching and have so much ground to cover. If you made it this in far in reading I’m thankful for you.
In the next blog I’ll explain what the World Race is and what exactly I’ll be doing but I wanted to share how I came to be here and how every step has been led by the Lord. I would like to take this time and express my greatest need: prayer. Prayer for the provision to answer this call, prayer for wisdom on the field, prayer for peace when times don’t go smoothly. My hope is to have this journey and team saturated in prayer so we are ready and able to respond out of love and obedience.
With so much love,
Hannah Sahatoo
