Long time, no blog. I feel like I owe you all an apology because I have not kept you updated for quite a while. I am truly sorry, and it is actually an interesting situation due to the fact that I’ve had so much to write and share about, but I struggled so hard to find the words to piece it all together. So, I am going to try my best to catch you all up.
Believe it or not…. month 4 has arrived. I am sitting at my dining room table at my new lodging in MALAWI! Woah.
I won’t lie to you—I was a bit ready to leave Zambia. As I mentioned in this blog, Zambia was a slower month. The ministry was good, but there was also a lot of laying around due to the crippling heat. And if you know me, you know I am very much of a “go go go” kind of person. Last month in Zambia was definitely a challenge, but God had some beauty tucked away in that slowness. You can always count on God to take a situation and add an awe factor to it.
I can’t say this month was my favorite for a lot of reasons. But despite that, it was actually my favorite month spiritually. God spoke to me in ways I didn’t expect.
A couple things I learned this month about the Lord:
- He has a sense of humor.
- He works on his own time table.
- He has way more in store for us that we can imagine.
Let me explain.
I’ll start by saying, I have never seen myself as a leader. Why? I don’t know. I’m still trying to figure that out.
Let’s rewind back to training camp in June. I was asked to step up and be the treasurer for my team. The words my squad leader used were, “We think you would be a great leader as the treasurer”. I don’t like finances. I am not a leader. Hence, God’s sense of humor. Yet I committed and just prayed that I didn’t screw it up.
Fast forward to last week (the first week in November). Last week, I was struggling with lies once again running through my head that said that no one cares what I have to say. That my words aren’t important, and they don’t carry weight. Obviously lies but nonetheless, I struggled to get rid of them. Something else I struggled with was that I realized I hadn’t been intentional with my team at all— self-centered to put it simply. In that time of battling these things, I got a phone call from a squad leader. The same one who asked me to be treasurer back in June. After a bit of chit chat she went straight to the point. “Hey Tiffany, this month we have decided to give all the current team leaders a break and we as the leadership team believe that you would be a great team leader”. Seriously…. I am not a leader. My response, “Are you sure?”
I was given a day to pray and make a decision, and oh did the Lord show me what to do.
That next morning, during my Jesus time, the Lord spoke to me through some lyrics of songs I had just downloaded. The lyrics, “I’m not finished with you” and “I chose you” were on repeat. The minute I heard those words the first thing that popped into my head was the question, “Do you trust me?” That hit me like a truck.
I continued my Jesus time. In the Word I read a verse (2 Cor. 1:19) that said simply, “In Him it is always YES”. Oh great…. I’m doing this… I am saying yes.
Of course, to make sure, I prayed one more time before fully committing. I asked the Lord to give me confirmation as to why he thought I could be a good leader. What leader qualities do I have? Again, I believed that I was not a leader.
That very day he answered my prayer. By obeying and being intentional with one of my teammates, I was shown a quality that is leader-like. Using the words of my teammate “I feel like the Lord is telling me to tell you that you are one of his Comforters. I feel like I can come to you and tell you anything. I can trust you”. Another cool thing is that the day before this conversation, my teammate had prayed that the Lord would send her one of the leaders because she was struggling and needed to talk about it. Little did she and I know that I was the leader the Lord was sending her.
What I say, “I am not a leader”
What the Lord says, “HA, you’re funny!”
I am who he says I am. And if he says I am a leader, who am I to disagree with him?
So yea. This month I am the new team leader for team Overflow.
Is it going to be a challenge? Yes.
Am I going to be perfect at the role? Nope.
Am I going to lay it all down at the Lord’s feet? I sure hope so.
This final month in Africa, I am going to grow in ways that I did not expect. Why?
Because the Lord has a sense of humor, he has his own time table, and he has way more in store for me than I could ever imagine.
Thank you for the continual prayers and support.
(P.S One of the most memorable things about Zambia. The church we got to be a part of. The picture on the left is our favorite pastor who claims Michigan is his ‘village’. The picture on the right is when I had the opportunity to give a mini sermon about struggles and challenges).
Talk to you soon,
ITR
