Hey everyone! Thank you to everyone who has read my last blog! I am still so excited to be embarking on this journey! Can I just say that God is so good! I am so thankful for the grace he has shown me throughout this entire fundraising journey (I know it’s only been about a week but it has been a crazy journey already). I never realized how little I trust God until this moment. Before now, the most money I have had to raise was $1,600 and now I am having to raise more than 10X that. I’m going to be honest and say that the other night I was so discouraged at the fact that this fundraising hasn’t really taken off yet (since the only person who has given is my mom…thanks mom). I broke down in tears when I was telling my mom that no one had given any money and that I was already so late in deciding I am going to go. I was upset with God and so I brought that to Him (He is so understanding and patient + I’m so thankful for that). I told him that maybe the race wasn’t for me because a lot of the other people going on the race with me already have at least $5,000 and I have $200. A lot of other people have more money than I do so they can afford to go. A lot of other people – at this point, the Lord spoke to me and told me to rest in Him. Rest in the fact that He is good, faithful, and my provision. Rest in the fact that He chose me, for some crazy reason, He chose me. Regardless of why He did, I need to rest in the fact that He is enough. Then the Lord brought me to this verse, “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14. This verse was written at the time of the Israelites and it reminds me of the Israelites trusting God, well kind of. When Moses led them out of Egypt (the land that had kept them enslaved), they were so angry with Moses saying that it would have been better for them to serve the Egyptians than to die in the desert. Slavery seemed far easier than to trust God for His victory. I am just like the Israelites when I ask God, “why haven’t I gotten any money for this trip?” I remain enslaved to the lie that my God isn’t big enough to provide. Moses said to the Israelites in Exodus 14:13, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today.” I am trusting that the Lord is saying the same to me: Do not be afraid, I will come through. I will fight for you, just be still. Being still has allowed me to understand more about God’s goodness. He has changed my mindset from “God why hasn’t this happened” to “God, I trust you, help me to continue to keep my eyes on you.” I am choosing now to rest in the fact that God always has a plan to prosper me, not to harm me. Thank Jesus for His amazing grace that when I obey His commands and then begin to question if what He says is true that He does not get angry but instead reminds me that He is so good.
1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love, but full-grown (complete and perfect) love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
