SO, there’s this one blog post that I’ve been writing for the past 3 months. I’ve re-written it about 12 times (no joke), and the reason it has not been posted is because I honestly could not figure out where I was going with it. BUT here I am now and I think I’m ready.
To begin, one MAJOR update that I want to share is that instead of Bolivia my route will now be starting in Peru. Yeah, you read that right. Of all the countries on planet earth, my route will now be starting in Peru.
If you know anything about my past, you know that I lived in Peru for most of my childhood and have spent my summers there as an adult. So, at first I didn’t know how to feel when I heard the news about the route change. There was real, growing anger in my heart about it because I wanted to see new places and meet new people and experience new cultures outside of what was familiar to me. Going back to Peru is like going home for me, and don’t get me wrong I love going home, but it’s hard. Even though I was told we’d be in Cusco, “Peru is Peru” I thought, and I couldn’t let it go. I wanted to see it as a blessing but I just couldn’t.
I prayed a lot for clarity on this issue, but it was always looking away from and not to the things I was holding onto in my heart that were rooted in selfishness. Honestly, I didn’t want to go back to Peru because I also want to experience things for the first time and not be the “tour guide” anymore. I know that I most definitely won’t be the “tour guide”, and I know I most definitely will not be treated that way by my incredible squadmates, but that is the lie I believed. For that moment I think my mind started to slip into thinking that I was going on the World Race for myself and not for God.
Learning that my past is a gift that I can use has been a long process. Sometimes I don’t want it to be, other times I embrace it. I often pray and thank God for every single little thing that I’ve gone through to get me to this specific moment in time, but it is certainly easier to be thankful some days than others. This is more than just accepting myself though, it’s also about accepting who God is and how He works. I think a big part about trusting God with the future is being able to trust that He had His hand on your life in the past. When I could trust Him with my past, it made it easier for me to trust Him with what’s going on in my future. Doesn’t mean that everything that went down in the past makes sense and is perfect, but that they don’t have to because I’m not in control of the universe.
With ALLLL of that being said, I am very thankful for my past and I am very thankful for everything I’ve gone through to get me to this moment in time. I am also very excited to go back to Peru and be with my team there. It’s a weird coincidence that in a time I was doubting whether I was on the right route or not, the very first month of my route switched to the country I grew up in. If you don’t think that means something, cool. I do though. And I’m excited to experience it in as a missionary on my own. Next year is not for me, but for Him. And for me to experience Him more than anything else.
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Apart from that, there have been some other route Updates! Heres the new route we are taking:
- Peru
- Chile
- Argentina
- South Africa
- Ethiopia
- Spain
- Macedonia
- Greece
- India
- Nepal
- Malaysia
I would also really appreciate prayer as I continue fundraising for next year while also finishing my last semester of college. It’s about to get really busy, but I’m so excited for what’s going to happen these next few weeks.
Thanks to everyone who has already donated to my missions trip and prayed for me through this time. You have no idea how much it means to me.
Much Love,
Michael
