“Are you sure?”, “Are you afraid?”, “How are you going to fund all of that money?”.
“Don’t you think you should go to college?”, “Is it safe?” “What are you going to see?”
“Who will you reach?”
No. I am not sure. Yes, I am afraid. AND honestly, I have no earthly idea how I am going to fund my race. Maybe I should go to college, maybe I shouldn’t. Im unsure, I don’t know.
Yes, I am fearful. Yes, there are times when I doubt. However I know who my Jesus is. I know what scripture says. I know what HE has said.
I know that when the disciples were fearful of the storm, they thought they were going to drown. Jesus replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and he calmed the waves and the storms. They were amazed. They couldn’t believe it.
When I got accepted into the World Race, I was overwhelmed, overjoyed.
Then I started seeing all of the things I have to prepare for, all the things I have to buy.
I began to feel like I was drowning. I began to doubt.
“Jesus, is this really what I am suppose to be doing?”, “Jesus this is impossible.”,”$16,600, There is no stinkin’ way I can do that.”
I just prayed and prayed, seeking wisdom from the only one who could give it to me.
He just came and he just kept speaking over me what HE HAS ALREADY DONE.
It was like he was saying to me, “Remember when I brought you out of the darkness. Remember when I took you out of that family to give you opportunity. Remember when I brought you through the storm and back. Remember all the things you thought you wouldn’t survive, and they only made you stronger.”
I am just so small compared to Him. How could I ever think that what He has in store for me is not the right plan.
How could I ever think that I could question the knowledge of the only one who can move mountains, who can make the oceans roar, and the rocks cry out.
I sit here and I sit still knowing that He is faithful. That he is a provider. That he is powerful. That he is God.
At this moment, I can’t tell you what this 9 month experience will be like. I can’t tell you the things Jesus is going to do, take away from me, teach, and grow me with. But I can tell you this:
I chose the World Race because Jesus.
I chose the World Race because people.
I chose the World Race because love.
I chose the World Race because Jesus made it clear.
Jesus has laid missions on my heart, oh so heavy. He has laid to love people fiercely. So I stand trusting Jesus in my decision of taking this gap year and to be the hands and feet of Jesus.
This would impossible without him, there would be no purpose.
I have faith that he is working everything out, and you should too.
