In lieu (Romanian currency pun) of the pandemic that has caused cautious & fear around the world, I am back at my parents house in the one and only Columbus, Ohio. Our 11 month mission trip came to an early end and within 72 hours of the news, we boarded a plane bound for America.
I read a Psalm today and the below verses have solidified how I choose to react to my current circumstance.
Psalm 106:10-13 “HE saved them from the hand of the foe; from the hand of the enemy HE redeemed them… But they soon forgot what HE had done and did not wait for HIS counsel.”
I do not want to follow in the Israelites footsteps and neglect the goodness God has done to focus on my current sadness. Am I sad? Yes, but God is good. Will I be sad tomorrow? Probably, but one day I won’t be. And on that day, God will be by my side as He is now and everyday.
I choose to remember what God has done in my life over these last 8 months. His goodness is far greater than this early end. God has shown me who I am to Him. I am His BELOVED daughter. I understand what having my identity in Christ actually means. I no longer feel bound by chains of worldly success nor fitting into the standards of the world. My joy is found in Christ and His unshakable love for me. This is as true today while I sit in my old room with no idea what my future will hold as it was earlier this week when I worshiped with my squad for the last time in Romania.
A mantra I picked up in Africa goes – God is good all the time and all the time God is good. I believe this and I know this is true. Do I understand the goodness behind coming home early? Honestly, right now I don’t. But I trust God. And that’s all I have for now.
I want to glorify God and the amazing work he has allowed me to be apart of throughout this mission trip. I have been able to love so many bright and joyful children. Children who live in mud huts. Children who eat beans & rice every day. Children who choose joy. I have heard countless stories of redemption and how God takes the broken, the lost, the dirty, the rejected and turns them into a warriors of Christ. God doesn’t care about the baggage you hold. He asks you to trust Him with it. To open it up and use it to glorify Him. His work is not done in any of the countries on our route. His work is not done in America.
Today during a video worship experience at Adventures in Missions they sang the line “I trust Your Hand. I trust Your Nature. I trust Your Timing, LORD.” These are my truths. I do. I trust. I declare that my circumstance does not determine my faith. Being home is a plot twist rather than an ending. I have no idea what is next. I have committed my life to Christ and I will wait for His counsel on what my tomorrow looks like.
The below is how I ended my prayer the morning we received the news that we would be returning to America. Through all of the unknowns, these are still my truths.
I love You more than the race. I love You more than my sadness. I love You more than 3 months in Europe. I love You more than my dream team. I love You more
So be it.
