One thing I’ve always struggled with is how easily offended I can be at times. I’ve had several people say hurtful things to me throughout my life, but the most hurtful are the things that Christians have said to me.
Most recently, I had a pastor interrogating me about my tattoos; “Did your father give you permission to do that?” “What happens when you meet a guy who doesn’t like them?” and my personal favorite- “Since you’re a Christian now, are you going to remove them someday?” That was a whirlwind for me, and the conversation ended when he said his wife went and got a tattoo without his permission; he said they divorced shortly after that.
I was dumbfounded. As someone who claims to love Jesus, therefore you must love his children, how could he talk to me in such a belittling and demeaning way? The lord really spoke to me through that instance; while I don’t judge people based on their tattoos, I’ve definitely found myself silently judging people based off other things about them. Their words, their clothes, the way they smell, etc.
How many times have I moved seats because of the person next to me looks sketchy? How many times have I had mean thoughts of a person because they smell like they haven’t showered in days? I hate to admit it, but too many times to count. That’s an internal battle I have every single day. I have to make the intentional choice to love others despite my initial reaction to them.
As for me, my tattoos are a testimony to God’s mercy he’s shown me. I have tattoos covering self-inflicted scars, ones with biblical meaning, and others I have simply because I thought they were beautiful. Everyone has their own thing, everyone has a way of coping or dealing with life and the struggles they’ve faced. Fun fact: most of my tattoos I’ve gotten since recommitting my life to Christ.
Pastor, I forgive you. You made a rash and hasty judgement about me due to my outward appearance with piercings, tattoos, and blue hair. But I love Jesus, and I love you despite your words. As a Christian, we must be the bigger person. Often times, we have to extend forgiveness even when we don’t get the apology we often times feel we deserve.
I’ve had to learn to forgive people who haven’t apologized or acknowledged their hurtful actions. I’ve forgiven my classmates who taunted me and hurt me emotionally and physically. I’ve forgiven the men who have touched me without my permission. I’ve forgiven anyone who’s ever said something hurtful to me. These were things that held me back for a long time, but chains have to be broken to truly move forward.
thank you for taking the time to read my blog! I pray you’re doing well, and I pray you’re experiencing the breaking of chains as well!
much love,
Brandi
