I am certain God is calling me to go on the World Race for the next 11 months. He’s honestly given me a lot of peace about it. But as the days pass and launch is about to happen, I’m realizing.. wait goodbyes are tough. Like REALLY tough. Where is the excitement I usually have when a stranger asks me about the race?? I allowed myself to feel so much excitement throughout this process that when I finally sat with the Lord and thought about leaving the people I love for 11 months, I broke.
I broke when I had to say goodbye to my sister in the Red Lobster parking lot. I broke when I realized I will no longer be able to share the sweet joy of a hug with my nephew. I broke when my dad gave me a bag of lifesaver mints as a departure gift (mainly from laughter…). When I felt overwhelmed with emotion, I had to take a step back and see how much of a blessing it is to have a tough goodbye. God placed these important, incredible people in my life who I have the honor of calling my friends and family.
Goodbyes will never be easy but that in itself is a wonderful thing. At the end of the day, I have the privilege of looking back and seeing how I’ve been shaped and crafted by the Holy Spirit’s power in others. I can notice how He has been moving in the hearts of family members and in my own. To be honest, I initially thought I could cry forever about the constant goodbyes but God gave me the joyous reminder that He’s at work in them. Instead of sulking in my sorrow, He pushed me to write this post.
It’s not bad to cry because I’m thankful for the tears. However, I can now lay them down at the feet of the Lord and know they won’t last forever. When I left for Thailand last year, I was trying to escape from hardships (God ultimately used that to grow my relationship with Him). Leaving this time is a lot different. The relationships with my family have deepened and blossomed. I absolutely love my family and friends here but I know God has a purpose in calling me out there.
I view the seasons of my life as different puzzle pieces that will one day fill a big picture. Each person has been placed in my life to fill the pieces. Everyone has a purpose in the beautifully imperfect finished picture. Whether it’s one season or multiple seasons, God has shown me His steadfast love through constant community. He’s shown me that you can’t get the rainbow without a little rain.
So much love,
Anna
