I think we can all agree that being uncomfortable isn’t fun…. Its uncomfortable!!! We as humans, naturally like to stay in our comfort zones because it’s just what we’re used to. Trying something new or unfamiliar can be scary for most. Personally, I’m someone who gets excited for change, but when it comes to ME changing or growing through something I’m not comfortable doing, I get scared and I freeze up. Over the course of month one of the race, I have been forced to leave comfort for growth and it’s been surprisingly incredible.
Our first full day in Romania, when we met our ministry host, we went around the room to introduce ourselves, answering the questions he had for us. One of the questions he asked was what our favorite part of ministry to work in was. He also asked if we prefer speaking to people or doing acts of service. I answered these questions saying that I’m best in Children’s ministry and I’m definitely not a words person, but an acts of service person. Answering these questions, I think the whole squad was expecting to be able to work in what we do best so we were pretty pumped for that. Soon after that day, we found out the different ministries that we would all be in, and it definitely was not what I wanted or expected. My team was put in Evangelism. Our ministry is to go out into the city of Craiova and build relationships with people, tell them about Jesus, and invite them to church. When we started, I was excited to make new friends, but also nervous to openly speak about Jesus. I know it may sound silly cause that’s what I’m here for, but my mind was running crazy with fear. ‘What if I come off forceful?” “What if they think I’m weird for talking about Jesus?” “What if I don’t have all the answers?” “What if i’m not able to bring anybody to the Lord?” I had all of these fears and more. I feared failure.
So we began ministry and have been in it for a month now. What have I learned and loved about leaving my safe zone of children’s ministry you ask? A lot. I’ve learned that God doesn’t call us to be perfect, he calls us to be obedient. When he tells me to speak, I speak. It was scary at first, but now the mystery excites me. I can now trust that when I go to speak to people, the Holy Spirit WILL lead me as long as I just intentionally listen. I’ve learned that it’s okay to not see the fruits of your seed planting right away. Some people will need ten seeds planted from ten different people and some will simply need one. I’ve accepted that I may not see any of the fruits of the seeds I plant in people’s hearts, and I’ve accepted that that is okay. What God has taught me from throwing me into something I have never done before, is that I cannot grow if I stay in my comfort zone. He’s also revealed to me that evangelism is something that I actually enjoy!!!!! What??!!?!?! Evangelism is beautiful. Something that God taught me that ultimately took the weight of evangelism off my shoulders , was that when you fully surrender to loving God first, it comes naturally to love others, and when you love others, it’s easy to create relationships with them and even share the love of Christ with them. WOW!
In conclusion, thank you Jesus for showing me the beauty I was blind to when all I could see was my fear of being uncomfortable. Thank you for teaching me how to love, revealing new passions to me, and proving to me that growth is exciting, not something to be scared of, and it can’t happen in my comfort zone.
