Hello family and friends!
I am officially back home in the states and am so glad to be reunited and share my experiences with everyone. It’s been an adjustment coming back home but I’ve been enjoying the simple luxuries of being able to drive again, throwing toilet paper away in the toilet, and taking warm showers. Oh, and eating fresh and raw vegetables.
These past three months flew by. It feels like just a moment ago I was packing to go on the trip, so uncertain of what to expect, questions flooding my mind, worries about the future, and quite honestly, unsure what I was doing. I went into the trip looking for answers but rather than finding answers, I found identity and purpose. I’m sure this sounds so cliché (people leaving for trips and coming back a “new person”) but the Lord has truly done his will through me and in me and because of his redemption and grace, I am a new person!
One of my teammates and I were on a one-on-one and she asked me if I could sum up each month in one word, what would they be. I thought about this long and hard because each month was so unique and challenging in it’s own way.
Month 1 – February (Cambodia): overflow
Oh how beautiful Cambodia was. I absolutely fell in the children and in God during this month. I learned that needed to seek and be filled with the God’s love and joy and pour out of that overflow and not my own human will. In Cambodia, the Lord revealed to me his heart for his children around the world. Because I am his child, God wants to give me more than I think I deserve and doesn’t want me to be satisfied with just enough or half way full. He calls me to live out of abundance, not scarcity. As Psalms 23:5 says “my cup overflows with blessings”. He wants me to freely receive all those blessings and in turn, live my life knowing who I am and being a blessing to others.
Month 2 – March (Thailand): growth
My first month in Thailand was very challenging on many levels. I had a handful of teary days, identity crises, and missing home and Cambodia. However, March was the month that I changed the most. My intimacy with the Trinity grew as I had to lean on them for answers and comfort. My relationship became an every day pursuit. I felt like this month I was moving in circles, when I finally figured something out, something else would hit me. I felt like I was failing and not growing at all. But the irony in that is that I was maturing more than I was able to comprehend. Through every challenge, a new perspective and truth was uncovered. I also had to surrender my human self, need to control, and sense of perfectionism to live in the full freedom I am called to. This was really hard as I pushed myself to give up my human nature and fight for change to become something so much better.
Month 3 – April (Thailand): purpose
April was when everything came to fulfillment and finally things made sense. I learned that as much as I wanted to give on this trip, I received so much more. The purpose of these three month, reason for my life, why Southeast Asia, role on my team, teammates, and every moment leading up to it all came to light. This month was filled with gratitude for the memories, people, and opportunities. It was a beautiful way to end the three months. It also prepared and encouraged me to continue my journey at home.
As I walk into life in America, I am reminded daily that the opportunities didn’t just end when I got on the plane. I would be doing myself a disservice if I came home, slipped into my old ways, and just looked back at these months as a mere experience. God calls us to minister and be light no matter where we are. Although ministry at home may not be a set time or with a certain people group, it’s in the conversations I have and ways I bless those around me. It’s really easy to love those who seem to have less or are strangers that live in third world countries. Trust me, I know. However, real faith and obedience comes from when I say YESto loving and serving those I see everyday just as I did abroad. God is the same God here in America as He was in SEA and that is such a constant. It’s our job as followers to lean into Him every day no matter where we are.
I would love to encourage you to seek opportunities in your every day life to love, serve, and give like Jesus did. “Mission trips” can be in your home, work place, school, anywhere you are! Take these moments to see the ways God is moving and how you can be apart of it.
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All in all, I am so thankful for this experience.
Thank you to my donors and supporters. I would not have been able to go experience and grow without you and your financial and spiritual support. No words will ever express my gratitude for your generosity and for simply believing in me.
Thank you to my family and friends who have walked along side me from when I decided to go on the trip last year to packing in January, and being home now.
Thank you to Cambodia and Thailand for so warmly welcoming me to be apart of your culture with such open arms and making goodbyes so hard. Oh, and for the delicious and cost friendly food!
Thank you to all the people I’ve met for encouraging me, speaking life into, allowing me to share my heart with you, and showing me Christ’s love with such authenticity.
Thank you to the Ladies of the S.E.A (my team) for loving me and showing me the beauty of the body of Christ. Thank you for dealing with my weird eating habits, picking up my slang, and working out with me. Truly love you all, sweetie bears!
Thank you God for your faithfulness, protection, and goodness throughout the past three months and into eternity. Thank you for meeting me where I was and for your never-ending grace.
Thank you me for choosing to step into change, seeking intentionality, being selfless, and challenging yourself to grow in every way. You should be (humbly) proud of yourself, Steph.
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And with that, here’s saying goodbye to such a memorable chapter of my life. I am hoping to post a recap video in a couple weeks once I can get myself to sit down and edit it so stay tuned. Please feel free to reach out if you would like to hear more about my experience, I would love to share more! Thank you for keeping up with me on this adventure and reading my blogs. I hope you enjoyed them!
–Steph from home, California, USA.
