I wish to say that I wasn’t sick the last week and a half of our time in Zimbabwe, but unfortunately the forces of nature were against my favor. Thankfully, it ended up just being the flu and step throat but you never know what it could be in a developing country with the plethora of unknown micro organisms in the food, water, animals, and insects.
But God is always so faithful to meet us where we are at, and of course He revealed yet another part of Himself to me while I was bedridden. As a go-getter and self sufficient functioning human, it is hard for me to ask for help or to rely on others. But during my sickness I couldn’t do much for myself, and I was just laying in bed while my sweet roommates brought me food, water, and medicine. It isn’t the way I prefer to live my life but the high fever and body aches forced me to do nothing but lay and rest.
During this time, I saw how hopeless I was to help my self. The only way I could function was with the help of the community around me and they willingly served me with grateful hearts. I didn’t need to ask them and they didn’t do it with grumbling or bitterness in their heart. They love me so they wanted to help me. They wanted to serve me.
And during the times of them helping me I came face to face with the sweet realization that not only is it ok for me to have others help me but most importantly I saw through my time of sickness that Jesus WANTS to help me. Sometimes we need to be brought to the bottom of ourselves to realize this. Mine was a minor sickness that put me in bed for 10 days, but it can be bigger than this, and usually is. Jesus loves meeting us at our lowest point because He loves to show His perfect grace and compassion for us. He isn’t a father that kicks us when we are down, and He never asks us for anything in return. All we have to do is lay at His feet and allow Him to help us. My team didn’t ask for anything in return for their service to me and neither does Jesus. He delights in loving us. He delights in us being completely helpless that all we can do it turn to Him. Jesus doesn’t want us to be reliant on ourselves, He wants us to turn to Him.
We are sick. From so many things in life. The brokenness of this world and the sin that so rampantly engulfs us leaves us sick in so many different forms. And when we are so sick, so desperately paralyzed from the pain of this world, all He wants to do is carry us. He wants to help us, and He is so good at it. He loves to do it. It’s what He made to do. He is a loving Father who cares for us when we are sick, physically and emotionally.
You know what would have been hard? Getting up when my entire body ached at every step I took, trying to make myself food. It would have been painful to go minister to the community with a scarcely high fever, but I didn’t have to. My team helped me through that time. They carried me through.
It’s painful to muster through life when it hurts to take other step or live another day, but we don’t have to and our Father doesn’t want us to. He wants us to lay down and rest and heal. He wants us to heal with and through Him. When we allow ourselves to heal properly through His loving and tender care, we come out stronger on the other end.
