I’m not going to lie, the beginning of last week was hard. I was not in the right mindset and Satan was attacking me with emotions which often overwhelms me. I was struggling with accepting reality and outcomes of past choices. Like times before, I was struggling with seeing the point of this even though I knew deep down it is a good point.
I found myself in tears, which I don’t like being in tears, many times to my family over the phone and to one of my teammates. I was trying to work through a few things and Satan decided to attack hard during this vulnerable time like he often does. My dad encouraged me to just sit and talk with a teammate even though I don’t enjoy talking about my emotions. I finally got the courage to do that. He was right: talking things out with someone who loves you as a sister in Christ makes things a lot better.
As I started thinking over this time of struggle, it made me remember something my host told me one of the first few days. He was talking about the work we’d be doing in the office and that sometimes we may feel “broken” because of all the work. He asked if that was okay and our response was of course! We’ll try our very best to get everything done. And yeah, sometimes it will be overwhelming in the moment, but in the end, everything will get done. He said good because “what did Jesus do before He blessed His people?”
Now that made me think. Jesus broke the bread before He blessed His people. Wow. That was a big realization for me. Read that sentence again. Jesus broke the bread before He blessed His people. That is HUGE!!
God always has a plan for each and everyone of us, and that plan is a good plan even if we don’t see it at the moment.
So yeah, God often breaks you down before blessing you. He breaks you down in order to reveal the “bad” things in your life and things you need to let go of. He’s trying to chisel off the “dead weight” in order to shape us into the amazing child God sees in all of us and to be more like Jesus, a goal we all want to live to meet.
Being broken first is scary. It makes me want to run for the hills because I hate feeling broken and like I am doing something wrong. But God does not accept that. He will work with us every single second of every single day to get through the period of feeling broken. It will be hard and feel endless, but it will turn into a blessing in the end.
Some people out there may feel that they are too broken to be turned into a blessing. But remember who our God is! He is the King of Kings. The light in the darkness. Father to all. Strength in weakness. There is absolutely nothing too big for God to turn into a blessing because He has already conquered the whole world.
Thanks for reading! If you have any questions or want to talk, comment or reach out to me through email! I’d love to talk things through when I can!
Also as I was writing this blog, I rewatched a common video played during Junkyard, my youth group at home, by the Skit Guys. If you’ve never seen it, I encourage you to click on this link, take ten minutes out of your day, and watch this video. It speaks a lot of truth! Here it is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QCkBL2DfVg
Praying for blessings for all!
Love, Paige
