Today I woke up a 5 in the morning to start my last travel day for the world race, wow that does not even feel right to say. Trying to sum up the past 8 months in one blog would be an impossible task so I‘m not even going to try.
It will be less than a week between the time we were told our parents were not going to be able to visit and the time we would be landing in our last country- America. This is not the end any of us had planned. On the world Race you are taught to hold everything loosely. There is no stability and at any given moment plans can change (and usually do). The only for sure thing was that we would be gone for 11 months and go home in June. So of course I held on to that with everything I had. My time on the Race has been so full. It has been full of love, joy, and so much laughter. It has been full of awkward translations, weird foods, gross bathrooms and ridiculously long travel days. It has been a dream come true and so much more. Through all the difficulties that came with packing up and leaving for what was supposed to be 11 months there was always a joy and a feeling of walking in the promises of God. When we would be in situations that absolutely sucked, when the heat was almost unbearable, when we were jammed in buses, when we were pushed so far out of out comfort zones and the joy started to slip away I’d turn to the person next to me and say “but I’m still happy to be here, are you?” without a doubt they’d always laugh and say “I’m still happy to be here”. The Race wasn’t always easy but it turns out leaving is a heck of a lot harder than anything else we’ve done thus far.
My friends and I would often talk about home and the things we missed, what our last week on the Race would feel like and how we knew it would be sad. We also knew it would be equally as happy. Right now it feels like we were robbed of the joy of going home. It doesn’t feel like I’m coming home because it’s not supposed to be my home YET*. Me and God decided a long time ago that my home would always be half in Texas and half where ever He sends me. This month my home was in Craiova, Romania with 14 roommates. Eight months ago my home was in Erdent, Mongolia with 6 roommates. So right now, I’m home sick for places I’ve never been and mourning memories I’ll never get to make.
Through it all I lean towards the Father because I came for Him and if we are going to go back home — I know He is still with us. I say “not my will, but yours”. That doesn’t mean my heart doesn’t hurt- not even close. Man it feels like my heart has been shattered in a million small pieces and scattered across the world. It just means I know God is still holding the pieces. I don’t know what I’m going to do when we land and from the sound of it I’m not going to the same place I remember. To be completely honest, I’m nervous and scared for what this next season is going to look like. God and I are still talking about that. I do know my people are hurting and scared,too. My country needs a savior just as much as any of the places I would have went to. I know that there are still so many people who need to hear they are loved. So, I’ll start my time in America by saying YOU ARE LOVED. Yes, I know to a lot of people that’s hard to believe- it was for me, too. It’s true, you are so dearly loved. Your pain, your fear, your past – none of it could keep you from the love of God.
•To the friends I made because of the Race: Wow! I sure do love y’all. Some of you were teammates,leaders,squad mates and some of you I only got to spend a short time with at training camp- but each of you have made my heart so dang full. I have had the time of my life creating memories and getting to know you guys. I know the friendships we have made will last a lifetime. Memories will turn into stories that I will tell my grandkids. Some of you know a ridiculous amount about me and vice versa. We’ve laughed, cried and prayed together. I have seen God move in each of your lives and am so honored to have met you. Right now we are all going though the same thing (no matter our locations) and I know God is going to continue to move big in your lives. Hold tightly to the promises He has spoken to you these past months because He never makes a promise He won’t keep. Know that he never fails and no matter where life takes you, you will always have me and Jesus. Honestly I am the absolute best at picking friends(; love y’all
-p.s. now we have to actually get each other’s numbers and not just use WhatsApp and messenger •
***Again, I want to thank every person who supported me and encouraged me these past month. It has been such a sweet blessin. love y’all!!
