Just so everyone know, this will be a long post. Very sorry about that, but a lot happened and I couldn’t find a better way to break it up.
The real truth: I’ve been pretty sick for the last two weeks. I had a lot of stomach stuff happening and I didn’t have the energy to move since Christmas. Now, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m pretty dramatic, which led me to the conclusion that I have a parasite. For comedic purposes, I named the parasite Reginald and starting to make jokes about caring for two now. I even started walking around with one hand on my stomach and one hand on my back, as pregnant ladies typically do. I found this to be very funny, of course, but in all seriousness, I haven’t really been able to do much except lay around. We went to four different clinics, each one of them not really being able to diagnose what it was, but giving me a bunch of medications to cure a variety of ailments. Two weeks went by and I wasn’t getting any better, just more stir crazy. It was frustrating to be sick for so long, to be alone for most of the day while my team went to ministry, and to be in pain any time I did anything other than sit and lay. Presently, my team is located in a rather remote part of Northeast India, so in order to get adequate health care, we drove two and a half hours away to a near by city to get blood tested for a parasite. That was our mission.
When we got to the city, we were met by our liaison’s friend and his whole family. We sat and had tea and of course took so many pictures. His father drove us to the hospital. The way that we had experience health care working here was that you had to know exactly what you wanted to be checked for. I marched into the lab, and requested a blood test for a parasite and a ulcer. I made a lot of funny faces while they took the blood and our liaison found it video worthy, so he recorded it. They both came back negative. We went and spoke with another doctor who was the most helpful one we’ve found her. She recommended that I take another blood test for typhoid and get an ultrasound. The blood test came back negative again, and we went for what was probably the messiest experience of my live, and that’s saying something given the face that I one time had so much oil paint stuck to both of my hands that they looked like I was wearing gloves. The ultrasound concluded that I have a cyst on my ovary and that’s what’s been causing so much pain the last few weeks.
This seemed like a solid answer. It was an actual diagnosis. I’ve known people who have had cysts. Basically, the conclusion we came to is that I could take Advil until our squad went to Costa Rica, fly home for a few weeks, get surgery and come back. That quickly became not an option. After a rather scary conversation with my doctor at home, the biggest fear was that the cyst was going to kill my ovary. The next step was to get another ultrasound. That result would determine whether I was going to get to fly home to get surgery or emergency surgery in India after being airlifted to the nearest hospital that could perform that procedure. All of a sudden, I had to make decisions about a future life I could potentially have as a nineteen year old who only wants to continue her life in rural India. The next day I was saying goodbye to all my people. Most likely I was going to be on a plane in 24 hours. That day was spent back in doctor’s offices, the day following I said goodbye to the rest of the squad and the one after that I was on a plane home. Luckily, my case wasn’t emergent, but it still meant that I was leaving the field. The fact of the matter is that it was hard. It was hard to say goodbye to my people. I miss them. I can’t wait to see them again.
This time has been a whirlwind. But, God’s been showing me some really cool things through it.
1.) There is absolutely no reason this should have been diagnosed. When I went to the hospital, I didn’t even see a doctor at first. We went straight to the lab to get tested for a parasite. My squad leader, however, was sick, and since he had to come into the city with me, used that time to see a doctor. The doctor ordered some bloodwork done, and he needed to see her before he left. She saw me and asked my symptoms and ordered an ultrasound. This doctor was the first doctor I saw that was actually helpful but I shouldn’t have seen her. Most likely, we wouldn’t have caught it until it was too late and it would have killed my ovary or burst, both causing an immense amount of pain, and in a town two hours from a hospital could have been dangerous. God’s grace alone got this diagnosis.
2.) it reminded me that I want to go to school for international relations. We went to several clinics and did a lot of tests and in reality, I could afford it. The whole thing probably totaled at around $50. And I am financially blessed enough to afford that and also to come from a family that does have the means to fly me home to get treatment. But, as our liaisons kept seeing the price for things, they kept apologizing for how expensive it was. I got an ultrasound for $9. I have a passion for everyone getting quality healthcare. We had the time and money to keep going back, but more often than not, that wasn’t the case here. Every single person has the right to quality health care.
3.) India has the most hospitable people. Everywhere we went, people would offer us tea and let us sit and chat with us. We were invited into homes, offered chairs, and given gifts. Past that, in the last week 4 different men have volunteered to drive us to and from the hospital, as well as acting like translators along the way.
4.) The faithfulness of God. It was a hard decision to leave the field. I had to say goodbye to all my people and the things we were doing here and then I was on a flight 40 hours later. But God has been faithful to me thus far. He promised me I would go to the nations and in the last 4 months I’ve lived in 3 countries in 6 different cities. I am living the life promised to me so why wouldn’t he bring me back? My race hasn’t paused, despite my referring to it as a vacation from my gap year. It has just taken a different turn. The entire time we’ve spent in India has been up in the air. We thought that this would be in the same town for three months when the longest we stayed in one town was 3 weeks. This isn’t different.
5.) God still moved! I hadn’t been able to do ministry for weeks because I had been laying in bed. When we went to the hospital, I got to pray over a woman and her kidneys
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I wrote this blog on the day that I flew out from India. Since that day, I traveled 34 hours to get home, got surgery, saw every singular person I have ever known ever it feels like, and lived in a state of luxury that confused me so much it was comical. I’m not kidding. One night, I walked into my dark room and pulled out my phone flashlight to look around because for the last four months, I have either had sleeping teammates or no electricity when I went to bed. I sat on my bed and forgot that mattresses felt that way.
You know, this whole experience was a little funny for, despite being rather dramatic. I wrote a blog two days before I got sick explaining how much I loved my life. Everything I was doing in India, and Thailand, and Malaysia was everything have ever wanted with my life. My life was awesome. Then, two and a half weeks later, I was on my way home. That was a hard pill to swallow. I felt like I had to hold onto this life so hard because if something derailed it, it would never get back on track. For about 3 days, whether or not I was coming home for this surgery was up in the air. And for 3 days, I was terrified I would never be able to come back to the field. After several days, I was told I was cleared to fly and I was given a choice. I could either fly to Guwahati, and get the surgery there, or I could fly home. Let me tell you, everything in me wanted to have that surgery in India. I wanted to insure that I could stay on the field by never leaving it. But, I felt like God was asking me, “do you trust me?”. In my last blog, I said that if you would have said that this would have been my life I would have believed you, that this was a passion God gave me since forever. And it happened. A promise put o my heart was fulfilled. Did I trust God to bring me back to this? Being home has been such a sweet experience. It has been overwhelming, exhausting, and had, but its been good. It was where I needed to be, and what I needed to happen.
Fun Fact: I am heading back to India today
