I wish I could say Cambodia was easy.
I wish I could tell you that the world race is a whole lot of fun, and that I have enjoyed every second of it. I wish I could tell you that life in another country is as fun as social media makes it look.
But…. the reality is that it isn’t.
I spent my first Christmas without my family, in a country where Christmas isn’t celebrated. In the midst of that my family back home was facing some really tough decisions, and fighting some hard battles, and I couldn’t be there to support them. I live as a Christian in a community that is one of the 31 unreached people groups in this country, meaning a lot of the people we come into contact with have never heard the name of Jesus. I have seen street kids begging for food, or money, or simply just wanting attention. I have seen brothels with women lined up on couches forced into selling their bodies. I have tried so hard to have conversations with people that cannot understand me because we don’t speak their language. I have walked through the killing fields and seen mass grave sites where thousands of people were once carelessly thrown a midst a major genocide. I have been asked to do skits, teach English, and give bible stories with no time to prepare. I have been told ministry would be one thing, gotten there, and it be completely different. I have actually sweat more in the last 3 months than I have in my entire life. Pollution is bad and dust will coat your lungs. There are mosquitoes, spiders, ants, flies, and rats.
Needless to say it has been different than anything I have ever experienced, and probably the hardest season of life I have ever walked through. Cambodia pushed me and stretched me in what felt like, every direction. I was in a season of discomfort for 2.5 of the 3 months I was here.
One of the words my teammate Lou gave me for Cambodia was uncomfortable beauty. I can say without a shadow of doubt that Cambodia has lived up to this. Although this place has been hard, there has been so much beauty in this season.
My squad and my team have become my family. I learned to let go of trying to control things that I can’t control. I learned the power of prayer, trusting that God is in control when it seems like I can’t see his hand on the situation. I have learned that a smile or a hug can do a lot more than I thought they could. I have been able to embrace being flexible when things aren’t what I expected them to be. I have learned how to have a spirit of yes, when I just want to say no and go home. I have learned that I have a choice everyday in every situation, I can choose negativity or joy, chaos or peace, rudeness or kindness, etc. I have had the privilege of living in a community with the sweetest most loving people I have ever met. I know the day they grasp onto Jesus and all he has to offer, Cambodia will change rapidly. I have taught the best kids, I didn’t know I could fall in love with these kids as much as I have. I have had some awesome ministry hosts that have cared so much about us and really poured into us here. I have seen the love of Jesus more than I ever have. I have leaned on Him more than I have ever needed to before. I have had to put so much faith in my prayers, because I can’t do anything and He can do everything.
Cambodia has been a fruitful season and I wouldn’t trade this time for anything in the world. I am beyond thankful for every minute of it, and I honestly cannot believe I am leaving already.
Cambodia, thank you for making this the hardest goodbye I have ever had to say.
XOXO
Teacher Rainbow.
