Lately I’ve noticed myself feeling so distant from the Lord, and I couldn’t put my finger on why… until tonight (May 2, 2019).
This morning we went to church, and in Africa style we laid hands and prayed over every member of the congregation. Some were crying, one was wailing, one threw up. I prayed aloud for things not of the Lord to leave and for Satan to go back to hell. I commanded the Lord’s presence to fall on the church. I demanded that the Lord cast out any evil thing. Then I went home. I ate lunch. I took a nap. I watched a movie with my team.
The movie ended and I immediately was bored out of my mind. I wanted to do something but everyone was cooking, reading, having Jesus time. So I popped my headphones in and I closed the bedroom door.
I. LET. LOOSE. I tore up the imaginary dance floor. Me and Bruno Mars went HARD in the paint, and I was sweating within the first like 5 minutes of my one woman zumba class. I danced shamelessly and silently sang to the crowd (the 2 roaches that live under our bed, in case you were wondering).
This was probably the first time I’ve truly been alone on the race. I didn’t have to worry about anyone looking at me. I didn’t have to hear anyone else’s voice. I didn’t have to think about another human being in my space. It was just me and the music. Right after I finished dancing I felt a weird tingly happiness in my soul that I haven’t felt in about oh, I dunno, 6 months?
Those 20 minutes that I got to be alone were b-e-a-utiful. So I journaled it. And as I was journaling about my awesome dance party, I realized… when was the last time I thanked God? I wanted to thank Him for the space He created for me to be alone and let loose, but then my praise just started pouring out.
Thank you for my family. Thank you for my friends back home. Thank you for my team. Thank you for the forever friends I found on my squad. Thank you for accountability and vulnerability. Thank you for a space to dance. Thank you for a brain and heart that takes care of others. Thank you for music and harmonies. Thank you for sunsets and Agnes’ cooking. Thank you for wild flowers and back scratches. Thank you for tears, happy and sad. Thank you for deodorant. Thank you for western commodes and toilet paper. Thank you for socks. Thank you for the way the sun peeks through the sky that looks like Jesus is just on the other side of that cloud. Thank you for hot chocolate and that time of year between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Thank you for my body – in all of its forms. Thank you for arms that hold babies and give massive tight hugs. Thank you for legs that carry me across countries’ borders and into villages and treks up mountains. Thank you for hands that hold others and make art. Thank you for eyes that see sunrises and the joy on others faces. Thank you for a heart that pumps blood and loves hard. Thank you for a mouth that sings and makes jokes. Thank you for who I am.
Today and every day let us not forget that He’s in the BIG moments, but He’s also in the small moments, the ones that we often forget to thank Him for.
Thanks for everything you’ve made and everything you do,
xoxo Emilie
