Anxiety is a struggle for me. This is something that I don’t always share with others. When I do, I’m often told that it isn’t at all evident, but it’s so real to me. When I let myself consider why I am feeling this way, it is most often rooted in a fear of failure; and failure may cause suffering, which is scary.

If I’m being honest, sometimes I even become anxious about my faith. It’s easy to say we know something, but to act like we know it is a whole nother story, am I right? So I can say I know that I am saved by Grace and not by works. Seems pretty straight-forward right? However, the Bible also says that faith without works is dead. Hmmm…

I often feel like one of those ball pendulum desk toys, with my understanding of “faith” and “works” colliding with each other. I am usually swinging to one side of the spectrum or the other, finding it difficult to rest in the center of the two concepts. This is also the case for me with other “paradox’s” of the Bible; i.e freewill versus predestination, acting in the midst of “waiting on God,” and other ideas of this nature.

Understanding this paradox is something that cannot occur outside of Grace. The more I learn to lean into God in the midst of my own human understanding (or lack thereof), the more I begin to understand these seemingly opposing concepts.

I used to let this lack of understanding of certain aspects of Christianity draw me away from God in frustration. Now, empowered through His Spirit, instead of letting misunderstanding pull me away from trusting God, I try to let it draw me nearer to Him in seeking His divine revelation. I’m not always great at this though.

As for this concept of “faith and works,” the Lord blessed me with a revelation in His presence today. Lately, I’ve often let the anxiety of failure get the best of me, and am not seeking revelation through the Word as often as I should. Today, while listening to KLove in my car, God let His Spirit descend in my atmosphere in such a tangible way that I was instantly consumed with His warmth and peace.

It was in this time, in the midst of my struggle to seek His presence, that He again reinforced His unconditional love, regardless of my works. Sometimes it is so difficult for us to really grasp that God’s love is unconditional with our earthly understanding of love isn’t it? Back to the pendulum again..

He wants us to seek to know His will and to follow Him, but our humanness prevents us from the perfect achievement of this all of the time.

Today, in His presence, He showed me that, in the times when I fail He has the power to make it well.

In a society that over-values personal success, it is easy to operate out of a fear of failure, which can have the power to paralyze us if we let it. But with the knowing that God can use our imperfections to the glory of His Kingdom, we can rest in the peace of His promises.

Our God is fail-proof. We need not be afraid of mistakes when the God of the universe knows our name.

I hope this encourages you as much as it did me today. I pray that you find peace in His presence today, and a knowing that no matter what, if you put your trust in Jesus, the God of the universe has got your back.

 This is the song that played on the radio today: Maybe It’s Ok by We are Messengers

I posted a link to the music video below. Take a minute to let this song minister to your heart. Our God is Good. He loves you!!