Hello All,
Here is a lengthy blog post that I had written after our second week in Bulawayo. It took some time to process what to share so that you are able to see how much it impacted us, as well as protecting someone’s story.
This is what I had wrote:
We are all rejoicing in the Lord for all the work that he has does this last week through us. We partnered with Youth For Christ during proclamation week, with the heart of giving Bulawayo to Jesus.
We shared skits, we shared our stories, we shared our tears and hugs and though that we were able to bring over two thousand high school and college students to their beginning of a divine romance with the Lord.
It was a week of not knowing what we were going to be doing until we were doing it but it was a beautiful week of us simply trusting that God is going to walk us through every step.
We planted many seeds, cried many tears and laughed till our bellies hurt. And we would all do it again if He needed us to. Zimbabwe has our hearts, and we wouldn’t complain if this is were we had to stay for the remainder of the race.
(It’s sad rereading this, because we have already said our goodbyes)
Here is one story that had all of us in tears. It was just one story of the hundreds we heard:
On Sunday, the Lord used us, again. As well as broke us in ways we were not expecting, awaiting a day of rest as proclamation week comes to an end. We planned a church series for a women’s boarding school while we were in the van on the way to them. With full trust that He is going to speak to these young women. Autum shared Matthew 14 with the girls, showing them that no matter what hardships we go through, His hand is always outstretched ready for us to grab on. Khurry shared parts of her story with them, showing them that even through grief, He is there. And before we left to head to our own church service, we gave the opportunity for the girls to come up and talk to any of us about anything that they are going through right now.
Miss AH found Autum and I. She shared with us that she had been analyzing us last week and this week she knew she could trust us because of the way we carried ourselves. Our hearts were touched, and in awe of this sweet girl. Not even a half hour of being nothing but purely open ears to this girl, reality hit us in the face of real world things.
In the last year, she has tried to kill herself five times. She remembers each situation so vividly. But doesn’t know why she keeps hanging on. She had a best friend once, but then that friend decided she didn’t like her anymore. She is an only child, and her parents were together at one point. But after they spilt, her mom could care less about her. Her dad wishes the best for her, but she feels she will never be smart enough to please him. She had a grandma, a strong God-fearing grandma, but she with the Lord now. Her aunt takes care of her, as her own. Her aunt became pregnant once and AH was so sad that she was going to have to share the love that she got from her aunt with this child. Her aunt miscarried. AH believes it’s her fault.
I had to butt in and ask Miss AH how old she was. My heart was heavy and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold the tears back. She turned fifteen, last Sunday. The first Sunday we ministered to that all women’s boarding school, was her first birthday without it being acknowledged.
(Side note, when I turned fifteen, Taylor Swift’s song was on full blast & my family celebrated me as if my birthday was a national holiday)
While Autum and I tried to speak truth to her, we learned that she doens’t feel she is worthy of God’s love. She tried talking to Him once, but feels as though she doesn’t deserve to be heard. She has no one to talk to. She wishes she did. She simply just wants someone to hear her out.
She finds friends in books. Her one wish is that for her 16th birthday, she gets the last Harry Potter book so that she can finish the series. To take the weight off the conversation, Autum asked, “What do you like most about Harry Potter?” Her response was so simple but still filled with so much weight. “I love Harry because he was a misfit child because his real family didn’t like him, but he who ended up saving a whole school.” She desires to be like him. But 2 months ago, she had a broken nose from some bullies in her school. She just doesn’t understand why Her, out of all the girls in the school, is the one who was targeted.
We asked her to tell us three truths that she believes about herself. That’s something that we have been doing as a team when we notice Satan trying to tell us lies. She couldn’t think of anything. She would like to think she is beautiful someday.
I wanted to share this story with you, because it’s a sobering reality of what we experienced during proclamation week. There was moments where we would have to step away to let our hearts cry out. I am thankful for my team, and their willingness to hold and to be held when we are simply overwhelmed.
We asked for a heart like His, and He surly let us feel a sliver of what He feels. Thank you for having patience with me, as I learn what to share and what not to share. And thank you again, for your continued support during this journey that I am on.
Because They Haven’t Heard,
Calla Rae
