HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I ASKED MYSELF THIS OVER THE LAST FEW MONTHS
Let’s rewind, about 2 months ago, I was doing my normal routine. I get off work, go home and scroll Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat (oh let’s not forget that Candy Crush Demon). This particular day I was on Facebook I ran across a picture of a little boy drinking from a dirty puddle of water and under it, it said these words “God if I have ever complained, I repent” That hit me hard, because so many times we complain about things that are a blessing to others such as clean water. I asked God, Lord how do I help those people physically. I don’t want to send money. I want to be able to help(serve) them face to face, not even 20 minutes later I get a notification from Asheia Wynne-Leonard talking to her sister Aundraya about the world race, helping the very same people, I just asked God about (COINCIDENCE ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!)
I should probably mention I am not one those people that grew up thinking, I want to be a missionary at all. I definitely would not have decided to do it at 32 years of age. So, now I am going back and forth with God NO I can’t do this, this is crazy people going to think I’m crazy, I think I’m crazy. This is not my plan, matter of fact my plan so far gone to the point I forgot what it was.
I was reminded of this scripture
Jeremiah 29:11-13 NIV
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
My doubt and indecisiveness left immediately. I started to trust in the plan that God has put before me. YES GOD SEND ME I’LL GO (I’VE SAID THAT SO MANY TIMES IN WORSHIP and PRAYER) I wasn’t aware that meant send me I’ll go, even if I’m just getting on my feet , or if my head is just above water or if my relationship with my family is better than ever or if after 2 years of being a praise and worship leader and I’m just getting comfortable in this position. It means I sit my plans to the side and I will follow were you lead God, I will go scared, blinded and uncomfortable. This lasted (HA!) for about 3 hours then these Questions came:
AM I DOING THIS FOR ME OR GOD?
TRUTH BE TOLD I WASN’T SURE AT FIRST. I PRAYED AND PRAYED AND PRAYED UNTIL THAT’S ALL I COULD THINK ABOUT WAS THE WORLD RACE, TO THE POINT I NEGLECTED OTHER THINGS AND PEOPLE IN MY LIFE DUE TO THIS “CALL” I ANSWERED SURELY THIS IS NOT GOD
(before I go any further, I do want to admit something. When God originally called me for “The WORLD RACE” He told me to be quiet (did I listen) NO!! I began to tell people I trust, to seek their advice as if God Plan for my life wasn’t good enough. I didn’t get any bad advice OR anybody discouraging me not go (at first LOL) , they were very supported but their voices started to get louder than God’s voice and I turned my face away from God to them. Through this Journey already God has revealed so much to me it’s not just about the race it about MY RELATIONSHIP with HIM, trusting him, seeking him.
Matthew 22:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 For many are called, but few are chosen.
Are only few chosen, because they ignore the call, can’t hear the call or refuse to take that leap of faith because of the fear or just maybe those opinions of others keep them in a place God is calling them out of.
I realized I had to shift my focus all the way to him. I now walk in his will/plan for me until that change. I will stay on this path trusting in him EVERY step of the way.
Isaiah 26:3 Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)
3 God, you give true peace to people who depend on you, to those who trust in you
OH YEAH
Doubt (the ENEMY) definitely tried to come in with the you have bills, you need a job, your head is barely above water but the devil is a LIE!!!!
Romans 8:31 New King James Version (NKJV)
God’s Everlasting Love
31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
So, I say yes this is the right call, I am so glad I answered and there is no turning back.
“GOD’S ABOUT TO BLOW MY MIND”
