I have another story. Jesus really has been making my life interesting lately.
I was out shopping one day, minding my own business when I saw a woman staring at us. She looked like she was in her early 30’s, she was beautiful, and you could tell that something was wrong with her. I just smiled and waved at her and then I didn’t think anything else by it. We started walking down the street and she followed behind us. I was a little sketched out, but I figured she wouldn’t harm us, so once again, I didn’t think anything by it. We got to our next destination and she was still behind us, standing and staring, so I turned to my teammate Victoria and said “I don’t know what to do about this woman.” Naturally, being the great person Victoria is, she turned and started talking to her. She asked the woman what her name was and the woman said, “I don’t know my name, I can’t remember my name or my family. I can’t remember anything.” She spoke amazing English, but she kept saying over and over again that she couldn’t remember anything. Eventually, Victoria asked if she was hungry, and she said yes, so we took her to this restaurant.
We sat with her and ordered her a burger and fries and while we waited, I decided to give her a name. We debated on Sarah, or Ester, then I looked at her and said “Dimbalalay, that’s your name.” She has the biggest smile on her face and she knew that that was her name.
(Fun fact about that name: it’s the name of one of the women in the village that I visit that is very close to my heart)
We played rock, paper, scissors with her and she laughed and smiled and had the best time.
We also had to eat half of her burger with her in order for her to eat it, so we made a game out of that too. She loved every second of it and so did I.
A little while had passed by and I looked at the girls who were sitting at the table with me and I said, “we should pray out loud for her,” and that’s exactly what we did. I prayed first and then Victoria prayed and while she was praying, the woman (Dimbalalay) looked at her and said “yea yea yea” over and over again like she understood Victoria’s prayer for her. It brought tears to my eyes, it was so powerful.
Life was going great, everything was fine, then Jesus decided to wreck my world….
It was time for us to go, so we said goodbye to her and this is what she said to us: “I want to come with you, I want to go wherever you go. I want to be a part of your family.”
I was sick to my stomach, I was in so much pain because I couldn’t help her. I couldn’t do more for her. She was so smart and deserved so much and I couldn’t do anymore.
We got in the van and I cried so hard, my heart had never hurt that much for someone before.
We got back to the guesthouse and I assumed I would be fine and my heart would stop hurting, but it didn’t… I was in so much pain and I couldn’t stop crying, I had to talk to someone about it.
I went to my squad leader Taylor and asked for help because I didn’t know what to do.
She told me that Jesus answered my prayer… yea I forgot that I’ve been praying for my heart to break the way Jesus’s heart breaks. She also gave me a new perspective on the situation:
I am not the first person to walk into that woman’s life and I am not going to be the last. The way my heart felt for her is just a glimpse of the way Jesus feels for her. He’s got her. He is going to bring more people in her life that can do way more than I can.
I don’t understand God, He is so cool and crazy and weird and so so so good.
