*Mom… prepare yourself. I love you <3
In an Uber, riding back to the house we are staying at this month and out of nowhere… tears. Tears start streaming down my face. And if you really knew me, you would know I don’t like to show emotion – specifically sadness & tears.
This was the first time I really thought about how long 11 months really is. The first time I saw how uncomfortable my life will look for the next 10 months and I can’t run to my mom to make it better. The first time it really set in that I will not be hugging my mom until December. & that hurt. a lot. I couldn’t keep back the tears, no matter how badly I wanted to.
I was in the back middle between Nicole and Emilie, staring straight ahead as they are both looking out their windows, hoping they wouldn’t notice me. But my God doesn’t let me sit alone when I am sad. So Em looked over at me and immediately embraced me into a hug as best as you can in the backseat of a tiny car. So I wiped away my tears and smiled, resting in that sweet hug.
But God wasn’t done yet…
Nicole takes out her headphones and turns towards me immediately embracing me in yet another awkward sideways hug.
They ask me what is happening and how they can best comfort me.
I felt so seen. So loved. So cared for. So… emotional.
Honestly, I didn’t think I would start getting homesick until month 3 or 4 because that’s when it will really set in how long I am away from Kara & my mom… or so I thought.
Imma be real, it’s been hard. Leaving behind all the comforts of America. Leaving behind one of the sweetest places (love you, payettes <3) I’ve ever lived at. Leaving behind the easiness of everything a first world country can offer. It’s not all social media portrays… yes, the kiddos & ministry are great but leaving behind everything you have known for 21 years behind… that is something I can only give to the Lord to get the comfort that won’t run out.
BUT! It’s been so sweet letting my teammates in on my emotions and how I am really feeling. Turns out multiple of my teammates have begun to start feeling homesick as well. The best part is that we aren’t letting each other sit alone in the sadness, nor are we letting each other stay there to long.
And that’s how we were created to be.
xo,
Ky
