I have just been accepted into the world race and as i’m writing I am fighting a lot of insecurity and pride. Going on this trip for me is an act of denying myself what I want and doing whats right. I hope that God will lead me to much treasure in heaven. Also the desire to comfort others and that bringing them joy may bring me great joy seeing there happiness. I am not being called specifically to this trip. I hear Jesus always talking about getting out of our comfort zone to help others. That’s what I want to do. I feel like i’m doing Gods will, not acting on a specific call but following his will. As i’m preparing for this trip I’m starting to realize that fundraising is very time consuming. Fundraising and working at the same time. It is all starting to hit me really fast but I know I will be able to adjust and do what I need to do. On top of all that I am dealing with my own issues in my life and my relationship with God. At times I feel unworthy to go on this trip and just in general. I guess I am just going to keep pressing on. What can be better than doing Gods will I just have to keep telling my self that no matter what my flesh is telling me, my spirit is stronger. This isn’t easy but I’m just hanging on. Waiting for joy to flourish or just and a reassuring touch from heaven that i’m doing well.
