Over debrief I went Kayaking at the lake. BIG MISTAKE. It was windy, cold and hard to navigate the waters. We decided to go anyways. My squad mate Shekinah and I eagerly loaded up in our 2 person kayak and set out into the waters not knowing what lied ahead. We paddled hard in the beginning, fighting the waves upstream like a runner trying to outpace a treadmill. We felt defeated so like the genius I am, I came up with a brilliant idea: “Why don’t we stop paddling and just ride the waves, We’ll just lay out and chill and somehow the waves will push us back to town.” This plan backfired when 20 minutes later we realized we were on the opposite side of this huge lake. I looked at the waters ahead like a sailor looking out at a storm he’s about to encounter. We began paddling like our lives counted on it. The waves were pummeling into our kayak, the wind was blowing fiercely in my face. We fought blindly through the waves, and after about 30 minutes we finally made it ashore.
I think our Christian faith is very similar to this. We are a people that love to take on the biggest waves, fight the strongest winds, and bear through the worst storms. We do things blindly, hoping for the best, because we love to have memorable experience marked by certain moments that we can look back on. We are a people in awe with numbers: how many people can come to christ at a church service, how many people we can feed at a homeless feeding event, how many missionaries we can send in the next year. Because when we conquer a big feat and fight through the storm, it makes for a great story that can show our “faithfulness” to God. I think all of these things are innately pure, however, I think as believers we all can ask one question that can lead to deep examination of our heart: Why am I doing this? And more importantly Who am I doing this for?
These are questions I have been wrestling with the last month and a half. In my time in Guatemala, I have tried to tackle the biggest waves and fight through the fiercest winds in order to get the best “lost at sea” story I can. I would ask myself before ministry in our village: how many sicknesses can we heal? How many broken legs can we see walk for the first time? How many prophetic and powerful words can we give? And in my month and a half in Guatemala, I have seen all of these things: I’ve seen head trauma gone, broken legs healed, families coming to know christ all in the name of Jesus. But after each instance I find myself unsatisfied and wanting to top the last healing or prophetic word.
This is what I have realized: instead of trying to advance the kingdom through my spiritual gifts, I have actually just abused them. I have taken something pure that God has given me and turned it into a good story I can tell for a blog. I have been missing a key element that surpasses all spiritual gifts, that tears down walls and restores souls, that breathes life into people: LOVE. Not the situational type of love that is temporary, but the unconditional love of God that flows out us when we are filled with it.
I can remember a normal day in the village and we met this sweet family. The mom talked of her faith in God and how she prays even through her tough situations. I began to encourage them to continue to seek out joy and to grow in even more faith. Then we just began to worship. We didn’t know any of the words in Spanish, but we just freely sang. Sang of freedom, of victory, of LOVE. Thats when she stopped with tears in her eyes and said “We don’t even speak the same language, but I think this is what heavens going to be like. I can feel the love of God!” She gave her life to Christ that day, and I don’t think it was because of anything special we did: we didn’t give a prophetic word, have a crazy vision, perform a miracle healing or give a profound preaching of the Gospel. We simply loved her. And love has no boundaries, it has no specific language it speaks, It has no standards.
Love simply does.
When love is all you have. Then its not about how many people you can bring to know christ, its not about how many good works you do and its definitely not about how many miracles you perform. Its experiencing the breadth, height, length and depths of God love and pouring it out to others. Its giving with your heart, rather then your hand.
So don’t overcomplicate your call as a Christian. The only thing we are called to do is love. Let love be the firm foundation that you stand on, the pillar of your faith you live by, the song that you sing.
I challenge you to not fight through the storms and winds of life in order to tell a great story. But rather call on the one who says “peace be still” and walk through life showing unconditional love to everyone.
