I didn’t think I was going to be posting another blog, but I thought it nothing but fair to share how I’m feeling with the chaotic, last minute packing and fundraising I’m GETTING to do.
I titled this Mountain to Valley because its the one song that has been going through my head…
Plagued by Your promises
Words You have spoken
Desires You’ve placed in me
Faithfully You will complete
From the mountain to the valley
From the desert to the raging sea
And in the silence or the city streets
Oh, Your presence always covers me
When I don’t know what steps to take
When I don’t know what moves to make
This one thing I can’t escape
Your love
When I don’t have the words to say
When I can’t seem to find my way
This one thing i can’t escape
It’s Your love, Its Your love
I just gave ya’ll the few verses that really stick out to me right now, but I 100% recommend listening to the whole song.
I have never felt this kind of stress before. If I would have known all that I would be going through, I honestly don’t think I would have signed up for this. But I seem to always forget why I am doing this and who I am doing it for. Every time I hear this song, it tells me that i need to take a chill pill because its going to be worth everything.
There are so many things I am leaving behind. I am leaving all my closest friends that I have learned to be co-dependent on in an unhealthy way. I’m leaving behind my little sister who is going through her junior year of high school and i don’t get to be at her games, plays, concerts, or there to encourage her the night before a hard test. I am leaving behind my brother who I haven’t seen since graduation and wont get to see until I get back. I am leaving behind my mom who is single and is working 25/8 just so we can have good education (she’s a superhero if ya’ll haven’t figured that out yet). I am leaving my dad who has been the biggest help with the little yet important stuff and who I also don’t see very much but now 9 MONTHS?! I’m leaving behind my pawpaw who is very sick with cancer, maybe the hardest person I have had to leave. But you know what? I hope you’re still reading and not thinking “Oh my, there’s Grace, complaining again.”
GOD IS SO GOOD
He has given me time to spend with my friends and family. I have made time to spend and say bye to my friends. My parents flew my brother in to see me as a surprise and i couldn’t be more grateful! My sister still has a whole other year that I get to be apart of, and I get to help her when the big college questions that come up as a senior. I get to spend small moments with my mom. Last night she came in late and laid beside me in my room and we maybe said 4 sentences to each other about our day, but it meant the world that she chose to spend that moment with me when she was exhausted. I get to spend a few weekends with my dad and step mom before I leave. AND AND AND here is the BIG God thing. I was blessed with a flight ticket to go see my Pawpaw last weekend to celebrate my grandparents 48th wedding anniversary. God is so so good. That time was precious to me with my whole family including my Aunts and Uncles and all my cousins! Like… How can I not see God in this?!
I was feeling really down and questioned if this was really the right path for me this year.
I know it is. Because it’s all the little things that I stepped back and looked at. Those little things give me just the right amount of peace that only God knows that I NEED. I have no doubt that God will put me where I need to be. The enemy has really attacked me when I was not looking at God. But God knows me. He knows how to get my attention. I just need to learn to listen more.
This trip is something I never saw myself doing. I may be leaving all my best friends and family. But the One who will never leave me behind in the mountains or the valleys, the desert or the raging seas, in a place of silence when I think I can’t hear Him or too loud to hear Him in city streets… HE is going with me. HE gave me the desire. So who am i to doubt that he won’t faithfully complete?
One more thing I want to mention… Something one of the girls from my team encouraged me with… “Our God is bigger than any number put in front of us.” Ive had a really hard time raising this money. But I know He is faithful and if I do all I can, HE will provide.
Thank you to everyone who has already donated
I AM BLOWN AWAY BY YALL’S GENEROSITY!!! Yall are amazing and I couldn’t have gotten this far without every single dollar that has been put towards my adventure.
Just think… the next time I blog, I will be with my new family in Thailand.
Love Yall!!!!!!!!!!
Sincerely,
Your Favorite Racer *heart*
