I came into the Race with an open mind about what ministry was going to look like… Or so I thought. Kids ministry? Bring it on. Evangelism? Out of my comfort zone, but I’ll do my best! Manual labour? Now you’re talking! Sitting with people in barely broken silence for 6 hours a day? Uhhh, what?
When I found where we were going for our first ministry, I was pretty excited! The information we got said our hosts run a feeding and discipleship program in some local schools and I thought that was pretty cool. I read some of what other racers said about working with David and Scarleth and I was ready to get into it! We landed in Tegucigalpa, drove to Valle de Angeles and started to settle in. Before bed that night we got an orientation on things like house rules, the schedule and our ministry. We found out we wouldn’t be involved in their usual ministry because the schools were out for break until a week after we left. Kind of sad. Then they told us we would be going to a nearby home for adults with special needs instead. We might be helping in the kitchen, doing maintenance, helping in the houses, or any other manner of things. “Okay,” I thought to myself, “That could be cool too!”
The first day we were there we got tasked with raking up all the leaves and mandarin oranges that had fallen on the yard. It was a simple enough task but it was satisfying to see the progress. Nino came over frequently to crush us with his hugs, help us pick up the leaf piles, or sit us down so he could tell us “Pinata mañana!” Pinata tomorrow. That would be fun I thought.
Tomorrow came, and we hung out in the musty bodega (storage room) folding and sorting clothes and organizing the shelves. I don’t think the work agreed with my sinuses because I couldn’t stop sneezing. It was, however, lots of fun to work with the whole team! We laughed and joked and listened to some music. But there was no pinata.
Day 3 of ministry and onward looked very much the same. They didn’t have more ‘real work’ for us to do, so each of us went to a different one of the houses on the property. The residents of the house I went to each day mostly had pretty extreme physical and mental disabilities so there wasn’t much for me to do with them besides to just sit with them. That didn’t sit well with me. I don’t like sitting still or not having a specific task to accomplish. So I folded all the laundry, washed all the dishes, swept the floors, and it was only an hour into the day.
It makes me kind of sad now to admit it, but I found myself wishing our hosts would give us some different work to do. That the people at the home would find a task for us. That I wouldn’t spend another afternoon sitting in the sun on the front step of the home in silence, or in the house braiding hair for the seventh time that day. I was getting restless. I was bored, and uncomfortable with not having a job to do.
Somewhere along the line, though, my thought process shifted. I couldn’t tell you the moment or event that caused me to change my mindset because it was more of a gradual change. I started to question my motivation. I re-evaluated my Why. I wasn’t in Honduras to change anything. I wasn’t there to fix anything or make it better, I didn’t go on the World Race to save the world. I wasn’t in Honduras to do a job. I was there to show God’s love. That’s my job. My motivation. My Why. It’s so simple, yet somehow I had already forgotten. To simply love, and if I was given a task then I would do that with love as well. After I had checked my heart, my attitude towards the ministry shifted. I started seeing my position in that ministry differently, what I was doing, and even my view of the residents. I started noticing her bright smile instead of her constant mumbling. I started to see his curiosity instead of the fact that he was completely non-verbal. I saw her hunger for love instead of her incredible shyness. I heard her laughter like sunlight through crystal instead of seeing her wheelchair. I saw a chance to sit in the presence of the Father instead of feeling burdened by ‘having’ to sit with someone for yet another day.
I still struggle with not having instruction or a job to get done. I still have to check my heart for my motivation. I still ask myself what is making me feel the way I’m feeling towards the ministries I’m involved with. I may always be challenged by this but I’m committed to learning how to live from a place of love. This is my challenge to you as well. If you hate your job, start working from a place of love. If your home is chaos, check your words and actions to ensure they all come from a place of love. If you don’t feel loved in your church, then take the initiative to love them first. It may not change anything about the environment you’re in, but I guarantee you that cultivating that heart environment will change the way you see your situation. And you never know, maybe the change in you will ripple out into your spheres of influence.
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Fundraising Update:
I’m only $178 USD away from my next fundraising goal on the 28th of February, and $5,378 USD away from being fully funded! God has been so incredibly faithful in making sure I meet each deadline just in time, but I need your help to meet the last 2 before I’m fully funded! I’ve learnt so much these past 2 months and have seen so many incredible things happen in ministry, I would love to be able to stay on the field for the rest of the year! If you feel led to support me financially, send email transfers to [email protected] and follow it up with a separate email stating that it’s for Emalea MacInnes’ World Race, and be sure to include your name and address so you can get a tax receipt! If you don’t need a tax receipt, or if you’re from the States, you can use the orange Donate button at the top of this page instead! (Please note that if you use this link, amounts will be in USD) Thank you everyone for your continued financial and prayer support! I wouldn’t be here without your generosity!
