Training camp, dang. I’m honestly not even sure how to explain it because so much happened it was insane. Leading up to it I wasn’t prepared until the very last minute and was so nervous I did everything I could to avoid packing or thinking about how hot Georgia was going to be. But eventually the day came and before I knew it I was awkwardly sitting in the airport with 40 complete strangers. The second I found out my team, I knew I was going to be okay because it could not have been more perfect. They’re amazing and I love them with my whole heart. We had worship and it was nothing like anything I have ever experienced. To be completely honestly I felt uncomfy at first and didn’t really know what to do with myself. Towards the end of worship one of the mentors came up to me and quite simply said “God told me to come talk to you and she proceeded to tell me that God loves my imperfections and that it’s important to remember his love for me.” This took me completely back because no one had ever done this to me and honestly I was amazed when she said that God told her. What?? That’s amazing! I want God to talk to me. I’ve definitely seen God. I see him in other people, I see him in the mountains and the beauty of the world, and I see him work in crazy ways in my life every single day. But I wouldn’t say I have ever heard him talk to me. Once we started learning about intimacy with God and the pathways to Him, I was SO confused and honestly very discouraged. A few of my teammates do hear from God and every team time they would sit down and tell us what God said to them. It was amazing and I couldn’t help but comparing my relationship with the Lord to theirs. However this was the enemy talking. Comparison and jealousy are not what God has in store for us and these feelings ARE lies from the enemy. I had numerous conversations about how I was feeling and found myself sitting alone or during worship just begging God to talk to me. I was talking on the back porch (something we did daily) to one of my teammates and she explained to me that you don’t know or recognize someone’s voice unless you know them. This made sense to me. You know your mom’s voice and your friends but would you really recognize someone’s voice who you don’t know?? Probably not. Throughout the week I tried to dive into scripture so much more and just sat there and talked to God. Told him about my day and how I was feeling.
Towards the end of the week during the 2 mile hike (which was surprisingly not that bad) I was finishing the last part of my hike and I saw Presley struggling with carrying her sleeping bag because it had fallen out of her pack. As I ran past her I heard a voice in my head and a subtle nudge to take it from her and carry it the rest of the way. So that’s what I did. She came up to me and said “oh my gosh I was praying that someone would take the sleeping bag from me.” Then I told her why I took it and she goes THAT’S GOD! Such a small, seemingly unimportant thing made me realize that I do hear God talking to me even though it’s different from how other people hear him. There were many ups and some down throughout the week but I can honestly say that training camp was nothing like I had expected. I stepped on a bee when I was in the “shower” and then the next day 3 huge pots fell on my head when I was doing dishes and I think I was concussed. However when these small not so amazing things would happen, and I told someone about it, the first thing they would say is “can I pray for you.” This was strange to me (in the best way possible) because I was so used to people just saying “oh i’m sorry” or “that sucks” instead of honestly asking if they can pray for me and ask God to heal me. I prayed more in the 10 days a training camp than I had in my entire senior year i’m pretty sure, and it honestly feels really really good.
The good moments consisted of seeing a shooting star for the first time, which by the way was like 5 mins after I asked God to show me a shooting star. How cool is that?!! Almost peed my pants more times than I can count, laughing at girls on my team. I had some of the best conversations about life and at the end of those conversations was gently pushed back toward the Lord and told to pray about it and ask him for help. My mouth literally dropped at some of the things I heard in talks because everything finally clicked and made me that much more excited to be doing what i’m doing next year. I would have never thought that spending 10 days in the HOT woods in Georgia would bring me so many smiles and memories as well as bringing me closer to God than ever, but that is exactly what happened.
Besides the countless sessions and talks with our team, we had many tent sleepovers, lots of porta potty trips, belly laughs, weird food, cliff bars, bucket showers, happy and sad tears, and new amazing friendships. Training camp taught me more about myself that I thought I needed to know but prepared me for next year in BIG ways. I learned how to be completely venerable and open with people who I just met and how to tell my story which is something I dreaded doing before. I can’t believe how unbelievably blessed I am to be spending the next 9 months of my life traveling around the world sharing the amazing love of God. God is too good people!!! :))
