When I left for the race I wanted to live fully for Christ by abandoning all distractions, comforts, and the things that were familiar and safe. I wanted to go into the most remote place of Swaziland where the little thatched roof huts are and where the African Lion King pride land was. I wanted the raw experience of missionary life in Africa.
Well ya’ll…
I GOT IT!
I am living in Nsoko Swaziland, the most rural place in Swaziland where my back yard is Swazi bush and mountains and my front yard is dirt road, African huts, and fields of crops. On my early morning runs it’s typical to run into a large herd of goats being prodded by swazi kids with large sticks and many times me and my running partner would have to maneuver around herds of wandering cattle or meandering donkeys. Most days in the summer it is 100 degrees and we are unable to escape the heat because there is no AC of course. These days cold showers are the best but it’s got to be military style cause the water tank will run out. The closest grocery store is a 10 minute bus ride away but doesn’t have many options and the closest wifi is a 15 minute bus ride away and it usually doesn’t work. As a result I’ve talked to my mom about 4 times in the last 3 months and my best friend 3 times. For the first month and a half we lived completely in the dark ages. We had no power which meant cooking with headlamps cause it gets dark around 5, no hot water, no lights so everyone points their headlamps to the ceiling, no charging electronics, and reading and studying by candlelight in the common room.
AKA completely detached from the real world.
Or.. am I finally living in the real world.
I can’t remember the last time I was on social media. I have no idea what all my friends are doing or what the new trends are or the popular memes that are out. I don’t have a snap chat streak with 5 different people that are each 200 plus days and I don’t have messages to text people when I’m bored and have nothing else to do. I have a small selection of movies to choose from at night but that’s if my laptop is charged.
If you are wondering what I do have it’s the prayer garden, my ukulele, my Bible, my teammates, a deck of cards, my paints, my music, and my creativity.
Breath… it’s okay I’m still alive!
In fact I feel more alive than EVER!
I’m present. I’m living purposefully everyday. I’m not living for instagram likes. You know I’m not even living for myself anymore. Something I heard many times back home in America was living for God and abandoning yourself. “Well sure Im living for God and that abandoning thing is mostly for people like overseas missionaries leaving everything to go serve.” False. Satan often makes people think they are Christian by being raised in a Christian home, going to church, or going to Christian camp. He fools people, telling them that they’re good staying in the easy and comfortable. That God wouldn’t really ask them to give up instagram, or God couldn’t ask them to give up those friends, or God can’t really ask them to stop that sport. Now I’m not saying God asks you to give up everything you love. He doesn’t relish in your pain or sorrow. “For I know the plans I have for you says the lord, plan to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and future.” -Jeremiah 29:11
He has GOOD plans for you and part of how to get you from here to there is abandonment from the things that distract or turn you away from Him. GOD MUST COME FIRST. Luke 14:26-27 explains it pretty well. “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple. And whoever does not carry their own cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.”
Does that sound a little harsh?
I thought it did. But don’t worry mom I don’t hate you haha. You must love God so deeply that the love for your mother and father (and phone haha) or anything else could be compared to hate when compared to the love you have for God.
Still sound harsh? What about a Father who sacrificed his only son, releasing him to a bloody and brutal death so that someone thousands of years in the future would have the chance of salvation and a hope and a future. That person is you and your best friend and your father and your cousin and the homeless man sitting on the corner every Saturday morning and the wealthy businessman riding in the plane above you. And the harshest thing about it is that most of them don’t even believe God did that for them much less accept his freely given salvation. Now that’s love.
So when God asks me to love him above all else there is no objection in my mind. If he asked me to leave my family and go anywhere I would do it. If he asked me to give up my dreams to follow His I would do it.(but you’ll find he aligns your dreams with his) If he asks me to give up everything for him I would do it.
I used to see people like this and think that they were crazy, radical, really Jesusy, Christians that were really going overboard and I certainly didn’t have to be like them to follow Christ. But no.. thats exactly what following Jesus looks like.
Reading this you might look at your own life and feel like you haven’t given up any comforts cause your living in a nice house with a trimmed lawn in a nice neighborhood in America. And for many of us this is where God has called us and feeling bad about not going to Africa to be a missionary is comparison. God calls people to different places and different lifestyles and trying to be who you aren’t will hurt both you and the people you were meant to reach. But anyways the things God is calling you to give up will look different than the thing He’s calling the missionary in Africa to give up or even your neighbor. Pray and ask God what you put before Him. What the first thing you turn to in the morning is. What takes up your free time. What you turn to after a long day of work or school. What you find comfort in above all else. And once you’ve written down your lengthy list (cause lets be real. We’re human and when I get home from a long day of ministry I want a spoon full of peanut butter and a good movie)
So here’s a challenge from me to you.
- Commit to making God the first thing you do in the morning. Whether its 5 minutes in prayer or an hour reading the word. It’s so important to make him first in our day when we want to make him first in our life.
- Be intentional about choosing Him over the things we have been putting first. It’s hard cause they’re habits and they’re easy and comfortable but choosing into God will be so much more rewarding and satisfying than searching for comfort and love in a person or food etc..
- Pray fervently for the Lord to give you renewed strength everyday to conquer the things that lead us away from time he wants with us. Prayer is the most powerful tool we have and because of it’s power the enemy tries to downplay it in our minds. So pray with faith and fervence. James 5 says, “The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”
It’s so funny cause God is speaking to me through this and I struggle with all of it. I don’t feel like I have the wisdom to even share about this and honestly I personally don’t but Colossians 3 says to “teach and admonish others in ALL wisdom” so I’m confident he’s given me the wisdom to share this. So if your reading this, it’s God speaking and I pray that He speaks to your heart and awakens a deeper intimacy between you and Him.
