I’m currently sitting in what will be my home for the next 3 months. It’s on a quiet street, in a small neighborhood, just a few minutes away from the hustle and bustle of Battambang, Cambodia.
Weird, right?
Not only that, I just finished my first week of my new ministry for the month. Just about a 5-minute walk away from my new home is a small church. We’ll be doing labor for them to spruce up the place. After that, we’ll be working with the youth ministry in the church and doing teachings and playing with the children. This all sounds wonderful, but at first… well, let’s just say I wasn’t thrilled about it.
Let’s go back to a few days ago when I arrived in Battambang. I was excited. The place is wild and loud, but I was so stoked to be here. My team and I had a couple days to get oriented and see the city before ministry actually started. And it was a great time! But what killed me was when I got wifi at a local coffee shop.
Like any normal individual my age, I checked my messages, sent my mom a text to let her know I was alive, and browsed social media. That was the mistake. Oddly enough, it was seeing the posts made by my squad mates that just about ruined me. I saw my friends making posts about the people they had met and the conversations they had with locals. Seeing this pushed me into the dangerous game of comparison. Why was I not meeting these people? Why did I not have opportunities like they did for these conversations?
Why were my expectations of the Race not being met?
So I went to the LORD. I didn’t go humbly, however. I ran to him and began shouting in anger. “Why are you putting these other people in the places I thought I would be? What is it that they have that I do not? I thought I would be sharing your word with people and seeing hearts changed, and you have me doing yard work? I did not come half-way around the world for that.”
I believe my God is kind and gracious. But He is also just, and unwavering. And he dealt with me in that way, yelling back to me, “Be quiet. I am God. Do not speak.” In that moment I felt something tighten around my throat, and in my heart, I knew that He had a grip around me. I couldn’t speak, even if I wanted to. Thankfully, it was time to go to sleep, and so I went to bed wondering what was going to come of all of this.
In the morning I found my answer. As I was waking up, I had a revelation. The LORD revealed to me that, in a way, I was right. I didn’t come half-way around the world to do yard work. I came half-way around the world to listen to Him and spread His Kingdom according to His plan.
In this one week I’ve been able to grasp that spreading the Kingdom of God isn’t preaching to hundreds, it’s not praying for every person on the street, and it’s not even making the paralyzed walk. The spreading of the Kingdom might end up looking like those things, but they do not define it. Spreading Kingdom is… loving people, as simple as it may sound. Loving people just as Jesus did, just the way they are. And even if we cannot see the fruit of this, the LORD is faithful. He will continue the work that we start. In Exodus, God tells Moses and Aaron different actions to take with their staffs. Simple things like, “Put your staff in the water,” or, “Throw your staff on the ground.” That’s all they had to do, and God took care of the rest. He turned the water into blood, and the staff into a snake. Moses and Aaron just had to take a small step.
Here’s to more small steps.
