Adventures WorldRace SethBarnes Sponsorship Giving

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I say to God my Rock, 
As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
My tears have been my food day and night,
These things I remember as I pour out my soul: 
how I used to go to the house of God under the protection of the Mighty One,
with shouts of joy and praise among the festive throng.
Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers have swept over me.
 
Psalm 42

 

I’m overwhelmed with emotion.

 

I’m rejoicing and I’m mourning.

I’m anxiously expectant but consumingly retrospective.

I’m confused and yet completely aware.

I’ve never been on a higher peak, able to look out and see the mountains, now molehills, the valleys, now shallow, and the roaring rivers, now babbling creeks; but still I find myself with a flood behind my eyes and a pounding in my chest at every step I take. 

I’m quite simply overwhelmed with emotion.

 

My tears of sorrow originate from many realizations;

of Inevitable Change, 

Insurmountable Loss,

Missed Opportunities,

Forgettable Memories,

Memories Unforgettable,

and of Hurt Unnoticed.

but mainly the Inevitable Change.

 

Very quickly though, my tears of joy take over and I realize

Change is Inevitable!

there is Insurmountable Gain!

Opportunities to be Taken!

Forgettable Memories,

and Memories Unforgettable!

that Healing Resurfaces!

and finally that Change is, in fact, Inevitable.

 

I’m beginning to grow more conscious of not only my tears but where they fall. Quite often they land in the laps of my sweetest friends or on the outstretched arms of my mother, but I’m noticing that there is a growing amount of tears streaming onto the feet of Jesus. 

As I lay at his feet, no longer in control of my emotion and my sobbing, I have no choice but to say something to my humble king. The only two words that I can come up with are “Thank you”.

As my lips speak those words my heart spills much more.

It cries out,

Thank you, Oh Lord, for your faithfulness. Your unending faithfulness through it all has brought me here and I thank you.

Thank you, Oh Lord, for your grace. Your unearned, undeserved favor gives me value and I thank you.

Thank you, Oh Lord, for your freedom. Your liberation has given my life a fullness this world cannot offer and I thank you.

Thank you, Oh Lord, for your hope. Your reassurance that today is not only the end of a chapter but a step closer to your kingdom comforts me and I thank you.

 

Though my emotions are not always reliable, my emotions are real. And in this moment of drowning in my emotions, I rely on a real and deep gratitude for my Solid Rock.