Don’t Shoot the Messenger is a spoken word that God gave me about a month ago. If you’ve never heard of spoken word before, it’s a form of poetry that focuses on the delivery and performance of the poem, and if you’ve never heard or seen one before, I encourage you to Google it and find some examples– they can be pretty incredible.
Spoken word in my life usually took its place during services where someone would get up and share what God had put on their heart in the form of poetry. Even a few members on my squad have spoken their words over our squad since our arrival in Guatemala.
About a month ago I go the idea for a spoken word about the church with the last line being, “don’t shoot the messenger.” I wrote it off pretty quickly with a “wow that would be cool,” and then forgot about it. About a week later I was sitting in church, and suddenly I was trying to remember something I’d forgotten without even knowing what it was about or why I had suddenly started thinking about it. After a few minutes I remembered it was the idea of the spoken word, which I now realize was something that God had given me and not something I’d come up with myself.
I started with that first line I had gotten, which I already knew would be the last one and the title, “don’t shoot the messenger,” and from there God started writing through me. It took about a week of writing and editing, but I’ve never been so sure of God’s hand in mine than I was while writing this poem. The words, flow, and rhythm came so effortlessly I knew that I wasn’t the one who was really writing this, and that God was using me to call out some of the things in his church.
After it was finished, I had no idea what to do with it. Growing up in a semi-conservative church where I saw a lot of the things written about in the poem, I knew it was edgy and that it would offend some people. But I also didn’t (and still don’t) think that was a bad thing. I prayed about sharing it for about a month, and now I have decided to do so. After all, the definition of spoken word focuses on its performance, implying that it’s meant to be said to an audience, and additionally, I believe that when God speaks things to us that are about more than ourselves and involve others, it should be shared.
So below is my poem written about the shortcomings of the modern-day church. Ideally I would have liked to record a video of myself speaking it out, but unfortunately the WiFi in Guatemala is not strong enough to upload a video without taking several hours. It is something I’d still like to do, so stay tuned in case I ever get the chance to do so. For now I’ll just have to share the written words.
Feel free the comment and share, and as always, please let me know how you feel about it whether it’s positive feedback or constructive criticism. I’m interested to know your thoughts.
Hello my name is Erika.
I’m the daughter of a father who spent 25 years a pastor, but every church was a disaster.
But hold up before you walk out, before I speak out, this is your scapegoat:
This isn’t something I wrote to just rock the boat,
What I’m about to say to you is what God has first said to me,
And the discomfort is a guarantee.
But I believe our God has never called us to comfort,
And just a quick tangent,
I believe the church is stagnant.
Caught up in its own world,
Too busy to see its effects on a little girl.
So get up, stand up, reach up, wake up.
Heaven is coming and the church is not prepared,
Listen close to what’s about to be shared.
I believe the Lord is calling out his church and telling us to wake the hell up,
Because what we’re doing now is not nearly enough.
We’re entitled to what we think is ours,
But even with our working hours,
Everything we have is from above,
So why is it never enough?
Why are we complaining, complacently maintaining schedules of organized religion
That God never intended for his children,
While the word of God is clear, do not linger here.
Don’t linger where there’s comfort,
Comfort in paid loans, comfort in homes,
Comfort in the government, comfort in paying rent,
Comfort in stability,
The church is becoming a liability.
So I’ve spent 20 years a pastors kid,
Let me tell you what I’ve learned.
Because Heaven is coming, and Jesus is near,
But these are the words in the church I hear:
“That worship set was rough,”
“The sermon wasn’t long enough,”
“Too many songs hurt my feet,”
“Hymns just aren’t for me,”
“The pastor isn’t wearing a suit and tie”
“Someone left their ringtone on high”
“The music is too loud”
“This isn’t my kind of crowd,”
Tell me church, when did we become so proud?
When did we begin to think we were better than the rest,
That our lives aren’t as big of a mess.
Your personal preferences are not Biblical references.
I’ve seen the results of church drama,
And that isn’t God’s promise.
The searing emotional pain that does NOT have gain,
The hurt that runs so deep, it plants resentment I know I shouldn’t keep.
All of a sudden people believe they’ve been mistreated,
And the congregation is split by disagreement.
Like some sort of sick magic trick,
Half the church is gone,
And the pastor gets played like a pawn.
And hold tight for what I’m about to say next,
It’ll wake you from your complacent rest.
Because our call is to live like Christ,
So that means we love like Christ.
If a sin is a sin, equal in weight,
Then don’t bullshit me with your homophobic hate.
A sin is a sin,
So when did we think we’re too good to let homosexuals in?
Let me ask you,
Is that really what Jesus would do?
Does Jesus look at the LGBTQ
and say “sorry, my love doesn’t cover you”?
No I don’t think so,
In fact if I recall his love covers all,
Even a sinner like me,
He calls redeemed.
Have we forgotten the word “relationship”?
What we were divinely created for,
And then with each other designed to form more.
I am sick and tired of the church trying to be the judge, always holding a grudge, who do we think we are?
Praise God he never gave us the authority to judge.
Praise God he never holds a grudge.
Where should I go, where should I turn,
There’s just more religious patterns to learn.
I speak in tongues and it’s too much,
I don’t raise my hands in worship and I’m not spiritual enough.
I am a woman, exactly who God created me to be,
But you tell me I can’t be in authority,
You say I can’t lead, I can’t preach, I can’t teach,
What do you want from me?
Jesus died to set me free,
And I know that you know that he died for you too,
So what are you trying to do?
This freedom from my savior, my lover, my creator,
That’s not what I see us represent.
We’re too focused on the present,
Too caught up in earthly things,
We know the truth but it still makes us cringe.
I know not everyone church is like this,
Not every Christian is oblivious
But God put it on my heart
To call out those not doing their part.
We should be building his kingdom here,
Because heaven is near.
But we’re not ready, still too caught up in the church drama,
Like Pharisees arguing over the virgin mama.
We’re no better than those who we think less of,
The church needs to learn how to love.
Wake up, get up, step up, to who God created you to be.
Church, can you not see?
I don’t mean any offense,
As you nitpick my words in defense,
I’m just playing a part
In sharing God’s heart.
I’m calling us higher, even when we’re tired,
So we can strive to become
A church full of love.
No longer one of grudges, judges, or complaints,
No more pretending to be saints,
Entitlement and “worthier than thou,”
All of it ends now.
It’s time for the church to pick up its cross and crucify its flesh,
Everyday making the decision to leave the rest.
Above all I hope these words made you think,
But also push your image of the church to the brink,
Heaven is near,
But the bride is still getting ready,
And her burdens are heavy.
So I’ve spent 20 years a daughter of a father who couldn’t lead sheep who didn’t want to be lead,
They usually just chose themselves instead.
This is what I’ve seen and heard,
This is what I’ve learned.
You can call me a liar,
And I said it before, but I’m just trying to call you higher.
And yes I know this doesn’t apply to everyone,
Some of you are living in love.
But those who needed the conviction
I pray it creates the necessary friction
I pray for growth and healing,
Endurance to finish our race as its end is nearing,
And for those who don’t agree, who refuse to believe,
Please just remember,
Don’t shoot the messenger.
