Dear Comparison,
You and I have been together for a long time. Longer than I realized and am comfortable to admit. You have lived as a hidden infection across the timeline of my life. A parasite, feeding off of my insecurities and fears.
You told me I’m not good enough.
You have watered the seeds of jealousy.
You have given me eyes of envy.
You have kept me from celebrating others.
You have told me I must be the best.
You have put me in competition with my brothers and sisters.
You have gifted me with tear-filled nights tied in a ribbon of self-pity.
You have shown me how to manipulate.
You have nursed my pride.
You have done nothing good for me. In fact, you’ve stolen from me. You’ve taken joy and graciousness. But, I’ve learned about your ways. You are sneaky and infiltrative, but I’m closing every door, window and vent and posting a sign reading “COMPARISON NOT WELCOME HERE”.
I’m getting a new house guest – their name is Acceptance.
They bring in the housewarming gifts of confidence, unity and contentment.
They tell me I am enough, I’ve been given enough, and I offer enough.
They wash an ocean of grace over me.
They fill me with truth and point me back to our Lord.
They see me for the masterpiece I am right now.
This is now a house of peace. This home welcomes in lenses of love, appreciation, comfort, security, authority and righteousness. Comparison, you have no power here because I refuse to give it to you anymore. You are weak. You are dying without your host to suck the life out of. But this death isn’t a sad one. No, this is a victory.
I know this may be hard for you – you may be jealous of my new friends and you may wonder what you did wrong. Let me save you some time and let you know flat out: Acceptance is so much better than you and will always be better than you. You cannot measure up, you cannot begin to compete with Acceptance, so don’t even try.
I am tired. Tired of the misguidance. Tired of hurting. Goodbye Comparison, and don’t come back, because there’s no room for you anymore. This house is full of goodness, kindness, patience and love. Find somewhere else to go. Or, better yet, stay on your own, because no one deserves your lies.
grace + peace,
Emma
If you liked this style of blog, check out my squadmate’s goodbye letters: Rachel, Alyx and Courtney.
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