I don’t really believe in coincidences, but I do believe in big, wild, crazy, God moments! I believe in an intentional maker who is involved and loves to send me sweet moments to remind myself and those around me of just how good He is, and just how much He loves us. I had one of these God moments, just the other day, sitting on the curb next to a 7/11.
My squad is at debrief right now which is a time set apart to rest, process, and reflect on the first month of the race. We’ve also had a bit of a dengue fever scare, which has meant that I’ve gotten to spend most of this debrief hanging out in the hospital with one of my sweet girls as she rests and recovers. Definitely unexpected, but thank you, Jesus, for incredible hospitals, comfortable places to receive care, and for healing! Everyone is on the way towards being all better!
The other night I had just gotten back to where we are staying after spending some time at the hospital, and was feeling sick and exhausted and honestly super irritated at life in general. I was very hangry, so I walked to the 7/11 down the street with Clarissa (another team leader) to get a sandwich for dinner. After we bought the food I was excited to go back, lay in my bed, eat my food, and not talk to anyone. But right as we walked out of the 7/11 I noticed a woman sitting on the curb right beside the store crying. Clarissa and I both felt a tug on our hearts to go talk to her. And I was immediately frustrated. I knew it was God and I knew I wanted to be obedient, but I also was feeling like I had absolutely nothing to give away. I was worn out. I was hungry. I am an introvert and I just need some alone time. But I’ve said no enough times to know I always regret it, and I’ve said yes enough to know it’s always worth it. As we walked over to the woman, I told Him that He was going to have to provide all the words and extra capacity if this conversation was going to go anywhere. And wow did He provide!
We got to meet an incredible new friend! We got to share the love of Jesus with her, pray for her, answer some questions, encourage her, listen to her story, and speak the truth. The conversation that I walked into honestly dreading a bit, turned out to be one of the most life-giving and encouraging conversations I’ve had in a long time. I really had nothing to give, so it was really up to Him to give me the words and even thoughts that this friend needed. And it was so beautiful to know that nothing coming out of my mouth was from my own striving or goodness or wisdom, but really truly all Him.
Our new friend is walking through an incredibly challenging situation. She was far from home. She felt isolated and trapped and scared to do what she knew she wanted and needed. The Lord opened my eyes to the reality that really it wasn’t about her boyfriend or the plane ticket or her friends back home at all. Really, she didn’t know who she was. She didn’t know her identity, and she didn’t know the worth and value she carried. She didn’t know that it could even get better. Clarissa and I were able to speak truth over this once stranger about her wisdom, dreams, compassion, thoughtfulness, love, and kindness. I felt like Jesus was giving me a glimpse into what He sees when He looks at her. No judgement. No disappointment. No shame. Just a whole lot of love. She is His! She is one of His most favorites!
I felt like I could physically see Him pouring His love, peace, strength, and joy over her as we continued to talk. And it was so beautiful to know that it wasn’t anything that Clarissa and I were doing or saying “right”. It was all Him. An hour later everything felt lighter and we left with hugs and laughter. I know that wasn’t the end of Him chasing her down. We got to see a little piece of her story and I know there’s so much more beauty to come. Thank you, Jesus, for giving us that moment!
Left that conversation feeling excited and encouraged by what He’s doing. Left praying that our new friend is able to find the help and support that she needs and that she has the strength and courage to do what she needs to do. Praying that she feels His peace like never before and that she is met by His wild, bold, and ridiculously deep love for her. Praying that He becomes so undeniable to her, that she won’t be able to stop bumping into people that will love her so deep just becuase of Him.
Left that conversation with my headache and hunger and stress forgotten. A sweet reminder that He sees me like that too! With love and tenderness and grace. A sweet reminder that He’s always chasing me down too no matter how far I try to run! A sweet reminder that He loves to use me to be love to others and to speak truth and life, even when I feel like I have nothing left to give! Maybe even especially then. It’s not about me. It’s all about Him. In awe of the fact that He wants to use me. He lets me be part of what He’s doing. Even when my eyes are sometimes so fixed on what I think I’m lacking. Even when I think I’d rather eat my sandwich alone in bed than love one of His most favorite people. He knew what I needed in that moment and it was that conversation.
God moments! Not a coincidence. Not a mistake. He never fails to amaze me. He never stops teaching me. And it just keeps getting better!
