Basically my whole life I have taken the back seat. I have let other people do things for me, tell me what to do, and make the decisions. I was completely fine with that. I was comfortable with someone else calling the shots. I was comfortable going with the flow. Well this month I was raised up as team leader. This meant that I had responsibility now. I was the main contact with our ministry host and had to delegate all the little details. I was the first person to receive information and I had to relay it with my team. So ya here I was being placed in a spot where I had to make decisions and I had to call some shots. No more relaxing in the back seat. It’s my turn to drive.
I’ve realized how much I lacked in confidence in myself, in my abilities. For the majority of my life I have relied too much on others. God revealed that to me though and I realized how unhealthy that was. So this month was a beautiful time where I have stepped into the uncomfortable. Stepped into the unknown aspects of leading and being “in charge.” Its already growing my confidence and has revealed just how capable I am of doing things.
God has equipped me with everything that I need. He has created me the way I am on purpose. I am handcrafted and loved abundantly and capable of way more than I thought. He is a trustworthy God and I didnt have to doubt whether or not He would provide help or guidance in different situations we were put in.
Also this month has just been so incredibly good. It was my first month with my new team: parresia. Let me tell ya I really really love the group of women that I get to do life with. We got to teach in a school and I was in the fourth and fifth grade class. We taught all the subjects and even go to have recess once a week (my favorite). Then in the afternoons we would switch off doing evangelism, playing soccer with the kids, and working with a drama club. I loved the variety. I loved hearing peoples stories. I loved getting to see children learn something new and it click in their minds.
we celebrated Christmas in a new and very fulfilling way. We heard across the street someone playing the guitar so we walked over to them and invited them onto our front porch. We sang worship songs in English and in Nyanga (1 of their native languages). We fellowshipped, played a little football, and watched a Christmas movie. It was simple. It was reflective. It wasn’t about the things or the bright lights. It was about how blessed we are to have received the gift of Jesus’ birth and the joy that has brought each of our lives. I cannot believe my three months in Africa are coming too an end. I love this continent so very much. ASIA HERE WE COME!
