Christmas in Guatemala!
Being away from home for Christmas was definitely different, but so so special. A Christmas I’ll remember for the rest of my life.
Christmas Eve, the whole squad dressed up all fancy and we had a fun dessert bar! We drank hot chocolate and coffee, and ate sooo much yummy food. We sat around the christmas tree, talked, and at night we watched all the fireworks light up the sky! Christmas Day we woke up and opened gifts from our secret santas. The rest of the day I relaxed, watched Christmas movies, and enjoyed the huge dinner made by all my wonderful friends!
Christmas Eve I was homesick. I had been waiting the whole race to open up a letter I was given at launch that says “open when you’re feeling homesick.” I’ll admit, I didn’t think I would ever need to open it. Then came Christmas Eve. Sitting on my bed crying for the first time on the race about missing my family and home, I realized there would probably never be a more opportune moment than that to open the letter. It wasn’t much, but opening that letter was sort of a declaration for me. A declaration that it is okay to admit I miss things and people that I left behind. Just because I have always been an independent individual, doesn’t mean I don’t feel the weight of being on my own for the first time. For so long I thought that being strong meant not submitting to emotion. If I can’t change something, why cry over it? To me, crying almost felt as if I was accepting defeat. I’ve made a lot of progress these past few years. I have recognized that emotion is not a weakness. Empathy is one of my greatest spiritual gifts! True strength means putting aside my pride and admitting where I’m at. Sitting in that emotion. Not trying to push the tough emotions down, but choosing to process the hard things. I’m still working on that last one!
I’m glad I miss people in my life who weren’t there with me on Christmas to celebrate. I’m thankful for my friends and family who love me and make being thousands of miles away really hard. (ALL my love to my sis in Scotland! < 3) I am blessed that this isn’t easy. I am finding peace with the empty space I feel in my heart as I am being filled up twice over by the community God has provided me with.
This is more than friendship. These are my sisters. And I love them so much. I am beyond thankful I got to spend this Christmas with them.
My cup runneth over. Cheers to the New Year!
XOXO, Cat
