we get to decide how we are going to talk about others
(what if, you only said true, encouraging, life giving words about other people)
we get to decide how we will view others
(what if, we heard rumors, and decided to honestly ignore what we heard and get to know people for ourselves)
we get to decide how to fill our time
(what if, you had that conversation in person and painted or read for an hour instead of being on social media)
we get to decide how to express our creative self
(what if, you tried something you’ve always loved the idea of, but never thought you were good enough to do)
we get to decide how we want to act towards others
(what if, when someone hurt us, we embraced them with as much grace and compassion and un-awkwardness as we would want in return)
we get to decide who we will confide in
(what if we only confide in people who have the capability and desire to hold our confidence)
we get to decide what we will believe
(what if, instead of believing that you will always be bound by anxiety, anger, sadness, lust, greed, people-pleasing, pride, gluttony… you believed that you can live above those things. what if you embraced the truth that those are learned things, so you can also unlearn them, and replace them with your true self)
we get to decide to not let our emotions and circumstances control us
(what if, we create an atmosphere where we love and have gratitude to matter what)
we get to decide how we want to sculpt our lives
(what if, you decided to live like everyday was the best day of your life, chasing mountain top dreams, instead of living mundanely or in fear)
We get to decide what kind of space we live in on a daily basis.
We get to create.
That may be one of the sweetest gives possible. Yea, it’s not likely that everyone will choose to embrace this and live creatively. But, you can.
I don’t know what my expectations were coming on this trip. I thought I would love the travel, do a lot of hard work everyday, and grow in my relationship with God.
But I never expected to walk into so much self awareness, work so much to love the community I was placed in, or build the foundation I want the rest of my life to be built upon. But we’re four months in and I’ve already done a lot of this. Until now, I’ve lived my life as a victim and a chameleon to my circumstances, living and finding satisfaction out of business, but never being fulling present. When things got harder, I got busier, and I honestly didn’t have time to think about anything except school and work and sports. Last October, I tore my ACL, and never expected that to be a good thing. But for the first time in my life, I had free time, and I had no idea that the free time was exactly what I would have needed to prepare myself for this season in life. This season, where I have had a lot of long afternoons to do whatever I wanted to do, and prioritize whatever I wanted. From this, I’ve learned that I don’t have to live a life of busyness, and instead, I can take the time to sit across the table and have a meal with someone and be fully invested in that; I can read a book and not feel guilty about idle time; and I can paint and draw and sit in silence in my 30 minutes of free time, rather than filling that time with all the things I have to do in the next hour.
I’m not living in the states and I don’t have a 9-5 job or kids or school or whatever. But don’t let those be your excuse. Creating the space I want is something I want to cling to and never let go of when I come back home in five months. It’s SO worth it!!!!
Love,
Cait!! <3
