“Home is wherever we are, if there’s love there too” -J.J.
Jack Johnson is one of my favorite musicians of all time. I have a lot of love for music, but he in particular can capture little moments and pieces of home like no other.
Home has become a moving place for me, because home is where there are people I love and who love me well, it is where I am free to have long conversations, feel my emotions, and love the little things.
Here’s a glimpse of what home is in Guatemala, from a day in the life:
At 7 every morning we have breakfast. Last Tuesday was pancakes with peanut butter, syrup, papaya, and hot black coffee.
At 7:45 we have devotionals. I’ve been reading a Proverbs a day every month, and am beginning Acts. I’ve been on Acts 1 and 2 for over a week now, and I plan on staying here all this week as well. It’s so crazy to me that Jesus left earth before sending Holy Spirit, so there was a period of waiting where the disciples and Jesus’ family just sat together in prayer.
After devos, Emily and I went to Parramos, the sleepy little town down the road. We bought 4 quarts of paint for our mural, ate ice cream at 9:30 am, and got a sweet girl named Sucel a donut for her 10th birthday.
At 10, we walked to our town with our team and finished painting the sky and volcanoes. During a paint break we gave Sucel a donut and sat with her grandma, Maria de Los Angeles for awhile. They invited our team to Sucel’s birthday party at 6 that night, which was very special, as we normally can’t be out past 6.
Around 2 we went to leave Llano. We have a precious boy named Lion in our village, who is 15. Him and his brother both have down syndrome. He loves to grab onto our hands and be lifted into the air. This day, he came up to us, covered head to toe in cow poop. He was distraught and would not let us leave. It honestly broke my heart. We had a very silent walk back from ministry as we started processing what we just saw. I was angry knowing that there was nothing I could do, and knowing that if he lived somewhere else, he would have so many more resources. Coming back to the base, I ran, and was hit with the realization that Jesus was heartbroken about his circumstances as well, but that he loved the boys and their parents deeply, and that He is okay with us being angry at the things that are unjust.
We processed at base, acknowledging that it’s okay to feel what you’re feeling, but those feelings don’t have to dictate your whole day.
Our team ate dinner, and at sunset, we walked back to Llano. Walking there in blue hour, we watched the pink clouds hovering over Volcan Agua, and had just enough light to see the yellow flowers lining the road.
At Sucel’s house, we were hugged like family. We drank sprite and ate nachos together. We got to meet her mom for the first time, and she is the first fluent English speaker we’ve met. For the first time in two months, as we sat in their home, we weren’t gringas. We were us. We were loved and family and had a place at the table. We ate hot lemon cake with the family and sang Guatemalan happy birthday. Sucel painted a picture of the mountains covered in houses, and gave it to us to hang in our room. They shared stories of family vacations, and hard times when they saw God’s love and hand so present.
I was reminded that the feeling of having a place at the table, is the feeling that is offered to all of us right now. God has a table set in heaven, with a placecard for anyone and everyone at each seat. It doesn’t matter if your seat is a little dusty or sloppy, it’s your seat, and you can be fully you.
Sucel’s father drove us home, with all of the windows down. It was such a short ride, but the cold air driving at night brought me back to myself. At home I only drive with the windows down, even when it’s pouring rain. And it was one of those moments where I was just tangibly alive.
At the base, a few of us played cards, then we had a girls night. I live with about 40 girls, so we did ‘speed dating’, and got glimpses of super sweet memories people hold onto; favorite childhood memories, moments when people felt the most alive, five liquids you would like an unlimited amount of on demand, a book that changed us, the person who we are inspired by most, what our family is like, ect.
This is home. This wasn’t a perfect day by worldly standard- there was anger and injustice and tears. But it was a redemptive day, where I saw God whispering his mercy and grace. I know He heard our conversations, felt our hugs, tasted the cake we ate with family, and smiled.
