Over and over again since I got here I’ve wondered what in the world I’ve gotten myself into.
We in America like to talk a lot about salvation. Jesus came to Earth as a baby, He lived a perfect life, He did a lot of cool things, then He died on the cross in our place and rose again so that we, sinners, could have our sins washed away and someday live in eternity with Him. Ok cool. Don’t get me wrong, that’s the heart of the gospel and it’s GREAT news. It really is. But often we just stop there. Or if you’re like me, you take that as now you need to do all these things to look like Jesus because that’s what He deserves because He died for me. Neither of which are what God desires for us. So what else is there?
Growing up, I’ve heard of miracles, sure. But did I believe them? Jesus did them, yeah. But no one else does. That’s weird. You can be a Christian and not be weird and crazy and cast out demons and heal people. All you have to do is go to church every now and then, make decent decisions, and just live a normal life, right?
That’s what I thought too. But the truth is, God is weird. Life with Jesus is weird as heck. He does weird stuff. Have you read the gospels? He just walked into a room and people were healed. He did all kinds of miracles, feeding 5000 people with just a kids lunch. I’ve always known that too and it’s easy to say yeah Jesus did that 1000 years ago, cool. But what about now? Doesn’t scripture say that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever? And what exactly does that mean for me?
The message version of John 14:12-13 says “the person who trusts me will not only do what I’m doing but even greater things, because I, on my way to the Father, am giving you the same work to do that I’ve been doing. You can count on it. From now on, whatever you request along the lines of who I am and what I am doing, I’ll do it. That’s how the Father will be seen for who he is in the Son. I mean it. Whatever you request in this way, I’ll do.”
Over and over again since I arrived in Guatemala, even starting at training camp, weird things have happened. People are seeing visions, prophesying over each other, healing people, doing crazy stuff. I’ll be honest with you, it scared me a little at first. It still does. What in the world have I gotten myself into? This is too much. I didn’t ask for this. I just wanted to be a good Christian and tell the world about Jesus and go on about my day.
But something I’m learning is that you really cant be a Christ follower and not be weird. There’s no room for luke-warm, easy going Christianity in the kingdom of God. He wants you to literally be Jesus in the world today because that’s how His kingdom will come and that’s how His will will be done. Jesus didn’t come so He could be the one and done, part of His mission in coming to the Earth was to prove that being human doesn’t disqualify us from wild, crazy, impossible ministry. He saved us from eternity in hell, yes, and that’s so awesome. But if that’s the end then we’ve missed it. That’s not the best part. He also empowers us to walk in the same authority that He has. I don’t know about y’all but that scares me a little. But it’s also SO cool. Why would you want to be Luke-warm when you can be on fire? Jesus wants to give you the power and authority to do even greater things than what He did on Earth—and He raised people from the dead. What on Earth.
Like I said y’all, I’m scared. Honestly. I’m intimidated. Something we all learn growing up is how to not be weird. How to fit in. In my testimony I already talked a lot about my needing to please people and needing to look good and look successful so why in the world would I willingly do some weird stuff like tell someone I want to heal them? Why would I walk up to some stranger I’ve never met before and say hey I was praying and God showed me a vision of you so would you mind if I prayed for you? That’s weird. That’s crazy. They’ll no doubt look at me like I’m crazy, especially if I go back to America and do that. Imagine going to walmart and telling someone you want to pray for them because you believe God has given you the power to heal them… lol at the looks you would get.
But God. I don’t want to do that, I’ll be totally honest with you right now. My flesh says heck no dude I’m good just being normal. But God. There’s something about finally realizing that God isn’t just a character in a book, He has power and He’s real. And He wants to give me power. And I have not only the mission and the responsibility but also the gift to actually be Jesus in my generation. Not just try really hard to look like Him, but actually take on His authority and His mission and become His physical body here on Earth. Trust me, I know how weird that sounds. That’s exactly what I’m thinking too, but it’s real. I haven’t done anything crazy myself yet because like I said, it honestly scares me and my faith is not quite where it needs to be when it comes to seeing some weird things happen. But wait for it, because I’m chasing the fullness of what God has for me and that’s going to be weird but so so good. And no matter how much that scares me, I want to be weird forever. I want to bring Kingdom. I want to be Jesus. I want to not only see miracles and see crazy things happen, but also be used by God to do those things. I want to walk in the authority that Jesus passed off to me in the verse I quoted earlier.
So sorry y’all, but I’m weird forever. Stay tuned for what that looks like.
With all the love,
ABM
