Do you ever wake up and do your morning do your morning devo and just sit there feeling Gods amazing wisdom and you want to just stay in that perfect moment, and never leave to face the world? That was my feeling this morning, Of course that’s not reality i had to leave eventually i had to go to work (i’m pretty sure I even stood on my stairs in the super man pose! lol) but i wasn’t ready to leave that moment, in that moment i was strong, confident i was at peace! I had read a devotional about control which is something i have been struggling a lot with lately in my personal life. In my case i want to control something (or try and control it) so i am prepared for whatever is going to come next. Like most people i have experienced hurt in my life and heartbreak 2 feelings we all try to avoid at all cost. When i say at all cost i mean AT ALL COST in my case i was making myself so unhappy trying to avoid it and control the outcome that i’m sure i did more harm than good. 
I am in a season of change and that makes me really nervous because i don’t know what happens next i don’t know the outcome. I also have anxiety so the fact of change and the unknown lol well you can imagine that’s a double whammy for anyone with anxiety. You start come up with every known scenario trying to plan for every single one of them, and you automatically go right to all the bad ones because those are the scariest ones. Which at the end of the day really steals your joy and makes it hard to enjoy anything! I told myself that when i got accepted to the race the next year was going to be spent preparing, mentally and spiritually as well as spending as much time as humanly possible laughing and hanging out with the people that mean the most to me. So you can see how the control and anxiety would be a problem with this plan. Lately i have been so worried about the people that have walked out of my life in this season and fundraising that is has consumed every part of my life. If i am not trying to figure out why they walked out i am worrying about not raising enough money to go on the race or not having enough money to buy my gear, or to pay my bills while i am gone. While these are all things i do need to think about they are not something i need to control, because at the end of the day I am not in control!!! I cant control someone leaving, i can do my best and be myself and if they leave well God had a reason for taking them out of my life. And of course that is not easy especially if it is someone you really care about but God never takes something away without replacing it with something better! This can sometimes be a hard concept to accept,but its either trust and have faith that he is a loving, great, caring father or stay miserable trying to control every little thing that comes along. (which by the way is impossible, humans were given free will they are going to do what they want or what they are lead to do and you cant change that. And there are way to many possible courses for you to plan for them all you never will be able to.) God provides! That’s simple God is never just going to leave you high and dry standing in the middle of your mess alone! He will always provide a way, things may seem rough and like me you may be sitting there going uhhh i don’t know how this is going to happen but that just means you are set up for God to show you how powerful he really is. No amount is to big for God hes bigger! At the end of the night when you lay your head down to sleep God already knows whats going to happen, he knows the path you are on and he has planned out every single detail of it. Why am I a person who has no idea what is going to happen the next min let alone the rest of my life trying to make things happen?
Enjoy what is in front of you, take each day as it comes, have faith that the Lord all mighty has already worked out whatever you are going through and he has WAY more power than you so sit back do your part and watch amazing things happen! 
