I think you should stay.

Yesterday was World Suicide Prevention day. It is a day that in all honesty is really, really reflective for me. I am in month two in Costa Rica as of now. We are working with a ministry called Ocean’s Edge. For me, this day is huge. Huge in the sense that  I always feel really proud on this day. To be vulnerable, I suffer with depression. It’s not easy. It’s not something I asked for. I think in the last eight years I’ve realized the importance of mental health. I’ve realized in order to take care and love other people I need to know how to care and love myself. I think depression can be this gnarly scab, it was from something that brought hurt and defeat and then the scab heals and it’s all fine again. But sometimes, you fall and the scab breaks open and the hurt is cut again. Something my squad leader and mentor had implemented within our squad is celebrating. Celebrating life’s small victories and even more so learning to count it all joy when we are in the valley. Jesus is cool like that to remind us to show us grace. I not only struggled with depression but I also struggled with suicidal thoughts. I wanted to end it. I know in my heart that I am loved. But I also know that this is something I struggled with for a long time. Knowing my heart, I know that it’s a huge growth point to just celebrate the vulnerability of sharing the things that society views as dirty. It’s been a lot of hard times and not seeing what’s beyond my hurt and letting my hurt and depression hurt me. In recent months, I truly discovered my sonship in Christ. I know I am His and he is mine. So on this reflective day, I want to celebrate the things that have pressed me to stay than completing suicide.

 

 

I think you should stay for your family who loves you more than you know.

I think you should stay for the friends that seem like answered prayers.

I think you should stay for last minute road trips

I think you should stay so you can fall in love.

I think you should stay for the concerts you leave sweaty with a hoarse voice.

I think you should stay to see your sister get married.

I think you should stay to see your older brother graduate college.

I think you should stay to meet your nephew in a quiet hospital.

I think you should stay to see your sister play Tracy Turnblad in hairspray.

I think you should stay to see the first snowfall of the season.

I think you should stay to see two people get married who mean the world to you.

I think you should stay for Midnight Whataburger runs.

I think you should stay for rainy days inside and new vinyls spinning.

I think you should stay for fireworks on the fourth of July.

I think you should stay for beach sunrises and donuts with your people.

I think you should stay to see the Lord work and take you out of the valley.

I think you should stay to say yes to new, crazy, life-changing adventures.

I think you should stay to eat Taco Bell at 2 in the morning and realize you’re not alone in your struggle.

I think you should stay to see answered prayers happen right in front of you.

I think you should stay for the first football game of fall.

I think you should stay so you can play a part of history.

I think you should stay to have slurpees on a hot Florida day.

I think you should stay for the sunsets that will leave you speechless.

I think you should stay so you can cheer on your best friend.

I think you should stay for the nights of driving around that bring peace and clarity.

I think you should stay for the campers that think you’re the coolest person to exist.

I think you should stay for your grandmother who has a heart of gold.

I think you should stay to say yes to the man who you prayed about for years.

I think you should stay to watch God redeem your toxic relationship that left you in pieces.

I think you should stay for the older couple who pays for your meal and you never met before.

I think you should stay because the nights of crying yourself to sleep are going to grow you more than you think.

I think you should stay to realize that it wasn’t your fault.

I think you should stay for confetti cannons  going off that bring nothing but joy.

I think you should stay to realize you need to show yourself more grace.

I think you should stay to say yes to something where you’ll meet a complete stranger who will turn into your best friend.

I think you should stay for the 6AM flight that will leave you with more peace than you asked.

I think you should stay for friends who truly into family.

I think you should stay for the moment God takes you to Panama.

I think you should stay for the letters that reaffirm your worth and value.

I think you should stay because your scars are going to tell stories.

I think you should stay for the 14 year old that’s going through the same thing you are.

I think you should stay for the dreams in journals that turn into reality.

I think you should stay to speak life into the things you conquered and already walked through.

I think you should stay for the nostalgia.

I think you should stay for the boy in Panama who loved you and lived life well at so young.

I think you should stay to remember just how far you’ve come.

I think you should stay for the people who take you in when your family kicks you out.

I think you should stay to not accept the love you think you deserve.

I think you should stay for the laughs that make you pee your pants.

I think you should stay for a new prespective on the hard things.

I think you should stay for the late night dance parties.

I think you should stay to realize how loved you truly are.

I think you should stay for Christmas mornings filled with good food and a heart of love.

I think you should stay to find out who YOU are.

I think you should stay to realize tomorrow needs you.

I think you should stay.

 

Jesus is good even in the hard times. I hope this will bring up hard conversations and make you reflect in just how far you’ve come.