Only 8 weeks left of the race, holy cow.
I’ve been thinking about what this World Race journey has been for me. I’ll start out by saying it wasn’t what I thought it’d be. This journey on the WR has been more introspective (inward-looking) than I thought it’d be. Before coming on the race, a lot of people would get me excited by saying things like:
“You’re gonna have so many crazy stories, see so many miracles and see Jesus move in crazy new ways”.
And honestly that’s a big reason why I took on this journey, I wanted to see Jesus move in ways I’ve never seen before. While He has certainly moved in new ways and done cool things- they haven’t been outrageously different than what He’s done back home. Just different countries & cultures. In some ways my relationship with Jesus has grown, in other ways not so much. Instead I feel like He has mainly used this 11 month journey around the world to reshape my heart, to bring out sides of me that I didn’t know were there and that I frankly don’t want to be a part of me hahaha. A lot of heart checking. I’ll admit though, I was finding myself getting frustrated because I’m not seeing Jesus move in ways I was hoping for. And I am sure I am part at fault for that. A few nights ago I was realizing maybe because I am getting too focused on what He isn’t doing (yet) that I’m not seeing the good things He is doing around me. I’m also realizing that even if the whole reason I was supposed to come on the World Race was for Jesus to use it introspectively and work in my heart, character, values, etc. than I need to be okay with that because it’s not a bad thing. It’s actually a very beautiful thing. He’s working things out in me. I don’t have to be overseas to see him do miracles. There’s this preconceived notion that when you go do overseas missions that you’ll see more miracles, crazier miracles. That you have to go overseas to see the miracles and see God move in new ways. (Raises Hand) Guilty. But I have found that just isn’t true. He isn’t just doing miracles overseas, He’s the same God overseas as He is in America so who’s to say you can’t witness those miracles that happen overseas, in America?
So maybe God has put me on the flip side. To see that going overseas doesn’t mean you’re gonna see more miracles. And please don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying God doesn’t do miracles overseas, you and I both know He sure does, as I stated earlier from the preconceived notion haha. All I am saying is that you don’t have to be overseas to see miracles. I’ve felt more on fire for God back home and seen more miracles back home. And again this is my personal journey right now. I know plenty of racers out on the field with me right now that have seen incredible beautiful miracles. I just think God has used this journey differently for me and sometimes it’s a little hard coming to terms with that because of how much I wanted to see Him move in those new ways; each racer’s journey is unique and different because God knows what we really need and it varies from person to person and it’s a beautiful thing.
With all that being said, maybe you’re asking “Tay, do you regret doing the World Race then since it wasn’t what you initially thought?”
Hecks to the NO. I will never regret this. I’ve gotten to see & do so many things I never even dreamed of. Sometimes I still can’t believe that this even got to be a season in my life. I’ve learned so many things that I’ll take with me my whole life. I know without a shadow of a doubt this is exactly where God wanted me these 11 months and just because it looked way different than I planned, WHO CARES, If I had to eat a skittle for every time things turned out differently than I planned, I’d stinking have no teeth from all the sugar consumed and probably have sugar diabetes. The Race was nothing like I thought but it was everything I really needed, even though I didn’t even know it. You’ll read all these blogs and read about each racers journey and you may gain some expectation on what you’d think it might be like for you- but you’ll never really know. The World Race is a unique tool that God uses for His kingdom and it WILL look different for everyone. The World Race will be a season of my life that I will continue to talk about for the rest of my life.
Soooo yeasiesss, I just wanted to be vulnerable about this because I was kind of feeling guilty that this journey has been way different than I expected but that’s the thing, it’s my unique journey God had planned out for me and it’s good.
Love ya’ll, thanks for the support these last 9 months!
Till next time,
much love, T
