in all honesty, i have only been to a literal church 6 times and those times were in the same place, the village in costa rica month 4. so how am i supposed to tell y’all what church looks like in ecuador when i haven’t been? well, maybe because it’s not inside of a building.
since the beginning of the race, i have been learning what it looks like to be the church without the band, without the preacher, without the lights, and without the pews, but with community. and let me tell y’all, living in community for this long honestly sucks. it makes it stupid hard to have alone time. even for my once extremely EXTROVERTED self! peace and quiet just doesn’t exist, and it’s like living with 30 other bailey’s, impossible to get along with 24/7. however, living with community is beautiful all at the same time. you constantly have people fighting for you. there’s always someone to stand by you, hold your hand when you’re lonely, and to let you cry when you’re hurting or missing home.
it’s funny because before the race, i didn’t cry all that much. not unless something really got to me, but since being here, i’m always needing someone to hold my hand and let me cry, sometimes over nothing, and i constantly am having to have someone tell me it’s gonna be okay. i’m thankful for my teammates who have always been there in these times. especially times like friday night.
backstory: wednesday the 17th, my mom texted me telling me to call her, that she needed to tell me something. we all hate these kinds of texts. makes your blood go to your toes and leaves you lost for a few seconds. i called her. she informed me that my dad has been having seizures (not sure how long) and that the doctors found a cyst pushing on the frontal cortex of his brain. she said that he would be getting surgery while i’m still away. i started to cry and she told me that the doctor said that it’s an easy procedure to try to help calm me down. it didn’t. and if you know me, you know that i hate surgery and that it’s makes me extremely nervous and anxious. i don’t even care if my dog could do it blind folded while flying a kite while tap dancing all at the same time. i still hate it. and it doesn’t make it any better that i’m 2,600+ miles away from home.
back to friday night: in team time, i told my team everything; how it’s affecting me not being there with my family and having to hear all of this news over the phone. after i talked about it, i received nothing but love. nothing but prayers and hugs and sweet, gentle words. they held my hand, let me cry, and told me everything’s gonna be okay. and it is. it’s gonna be okay. that’s what the church is about, isn’t it? having people you can count on 100%? that’s what this is. it’s church.
thank God i’ve got my people.
my team, my community, my CHURCH.
