I’ve been struggling to write a blog for a while now (clearly). I’ve been wanting to do a big recap of Costa Rica and write about all that happened there, but I haven’t been able to – for whatever reason, I just haven’t been able to process anything, let alone write it out. But after 5 days of travel, over 20 hours on planes, countless hours of killing time during layovers, and an 18 hour bus ride, I think it’s safe to say that it’s all come together.
As we were leaving Costa Rica, I wasn’t emotional whatsoever. In the moment, I felt like I had no significant connection to the country itself and was excited to move on. But since the moment we left, The Lord has revealed so much to me about Costa Rica and my time there – how He grew me, what I learned, things I’ll never forget… all of it! So I’m just going to start writing and see where it takes me.
Let me just start by saying that I absolutely loved Costa Rica. By the end of the three months, I learned to love every little part of it: the language barrier, my ministry, the culture, my community… everything. The key word there though is “learned” – It took me a while and it was definitely a learning process. But the important thing is, the Lord got me from point A to point B.
The biggest thing the Lord taught me in Costa Rica was the idea of ‘buying into joy’. Throughout my life, I’ve always been told that joy is a choice and that all you have to do is choose into it. If I’m completely honest, I always thought that this idea was ridiculous, and to some extent, I didn’t believe it. But the Lord really revealed himself in that area of my life. Starting off my ministry, I struggled a lot – my specific role didn’t have a lot of structure and I felt overwhelmed from the get go. Our transportation to and from ministry tested my patience in a way like never before. Our team spent a total of five hours on a bus a day. I missed home, struggled with the language barrier, felt useless in my ministry role, and overall failed to see the Lord working through me. The first couple of weeks or so were so difficult. But slowly, as the weeks went on, The Lord taught me the importance of buying into joy even in difficult situations. Instead of dwelling in the negativity I felt towards my ministry role, I learned to find joy in it. Instead of dwelling in the impatience I had towards our bus rides, I learned to make the most of them. As soon as I started looking at everything in my day to day life through an ‘optimistic lense’, it slowly started to become to my reality. All of this led up to my third and final month in Costa Rica. I got to the point where I absolutely fell in love with my ministry and every kid that I had the incredible opportunity to work with. The bus rides became my favorite part of the day (by some absolute miracle) and I looked forward to them and found so much joy in them. The language barrier became something that I loved, and as I’m writing this in my room in South Africa, it’s honestly one of the things I miss the most.
When I reflect on my time in Costa Rica, I keep going back to that one verse in 2 Corinthians, “the ultimate paradox”. 2 Corinthians 6:10 – “ [we live] as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything”. My whole time spent in Costa Rica was spent with teens, women & children who epitomize this verse. Through them, I was able to see the goodness the Lord has for us and how much I’m blessed with. So why was I so raging and upset about the bus ride? Why was I so upset with feeling useless at my ministry? Why was I feeling the need to make everything about me and be so quick to complain if things weren’t going my way? I worked with kids who literally have nothing yet live as if they have everything. These kids and the way they lived their lives – especially under their circumstances – really put a lot into perspective.
I want to talk about one of my last days in La Carpio (my ministry site). This day in particular really ties into the whole ‘buying into joy’ lesson I learned and that verse in 2 Corinthians. One day after ministry, our team got the opportunity to walk the women and children home. La Carpio is one of the biggest slums in Central America and is notorious for being one of the most dangerous areas in Costa Rica (you can feel the poverty and brokenness just by looking at pictures). Everyday we drove down the main street, but never got to walk through the neighborhoods until this day. We walked about a mile to Maritza’s (one of the women at our ministry) “house” – she had it all cleaned and decorated for us and was so excited to show it to us. Her, her two sons and her sister’s family all lived in a one bedroom shack. The room was about half the size of the average living room, and they all shared the same bed. As soon as we walked in, I was speechless and didn’t know how to react. Maritza and the kids had the biggest smiles on their faces and were so proud to show us their house. They found so much joy in their home and learned to see the Lord in it. After seeing the house, we got to walk down to the river and skip rocks with the kids. They were all so excited to do something so simple with us – they couldn’t stop laughing and had the time of their lives. Not only did these women and kids allow us into their homes, but they walked us all the way back to our ministry to make sure we got back safe. That’s over a three mile walk (half of it up walking up steep stairs) for women in their 50’s – not to mention the mile walk they had to do that same morning. As we walked home, we played tag with the kids in the street, rode bikes, laughed with the women and honestly just had the time of our lives. These people had so much joy throughout it all and it’s something I won’t forget.
I rehash this afternoon almost everyday. It was one of those moments that I realized, ‘I needed to experience that’. This was the turning point for me – after this day, I viewed my ministry in an entirely new light. But it wasn’t just my perspective on my ministry that changed, but my perspective on what felt like everything changed. I all of a sudden had this patience for situations thrown at me that I never had before. I had joy towards responsibilities that wasn’t there before (even doing the dishes at night became something I no longer dreaded). I had peace, understanding and easiness towards things that had frustrated me just the day before. I’m not by any means saying I’ve mastered any of these qualities (and I definitely never will), but there was an undeniable shift in my attitude and character after that afternoon. I don’t think I’ll ever forget that walk.
Moving on to something unrelated to ministry that I learned/ grew in… community! Before the race, I only had a handful of friends and surrounded myself with a small group of people. All of a sudden, I found myself living with over 50 other people in the same house as me, and sharing a room with nine other girls. The transition wasn’t easy, but the Lord quickly grew me in this area. As I’m writing this in my room in Africa, the separation from the three other teams has been by far the hardest challenge that I’m having to overcome (I only live with two other teams right now, the other three are 16 hours away from us in Johannesburg). I’ve learned so much from these incredible people. Individually, each one of them has invested so much into me. They show me love when I don’t feel loved, they show me patience when I was feel impatient, they show me grace when I don’t deserve it and they show me joy when I’m not feeling any joy at all. They bring laughter, memories, jokes, wisdom, and a feeling of ‘home’ into my life. They’ve stretched me spiritually and have pushed me to dig deeper into my relationship with the Lord; they’ve stretched me emotionally and have taught me how to be vulnerable; they’ve stretched my comfort zone and have shown me the rewards of stepping out into boldness (like participating in rap & dance battles… lol. Or not being afraid to walk up and ask if someone needs prayer). These people have taught me so much – but ultimately, they’ve shown Christ’s love through their actions and the way they live their day to day lives – whose goal is to solely love God and love others. They’re so encouraging. And at this point, I can’t imagine life without them.
Another quick lesson I learned… intentionality! I don’t even think I knew what this word meant at the very beginning of my race… whoops. Living in community has taught me just how important intentionality is – both with each other and the Lord. I’ve seen and learned firsthand that relationships can’t thrive if you aren’t intentional with each-other. Seems pretty obvious, but for some reason this was a hard lesson I had to learn!
Oh.. and another one! The power of prayer. I’ve witnessed firsthand miracles, healing and direct answers to prayers. One day while we were out, we met a man (who conveniently spoke english) who had been struggling finding a job (side note: this man was one of the nicest people I’ve ever met! We talked about sports, camping, Spanish, dogs and almost every other topic you can think of for over an hour). At the end of our conversation, we asked if he wanted prayer. He was so thankful, and asked for prayer for employment. After that, we said goodbye and went back to our group. About 10 minutes later, we saw him again and he came running up to us excitedly and told us that he had just met a man who offered him a job.
There are so many other little stories like this that demonstrate the power of prayer. There are so many other ways that the Lord revealed himself in my community. There are so many other lessons I’ve learned, stories I have, memories I want to rehash.. but I only have so much space on here. The important thing though, is God is good! Oh, and also, I’m doing really well! These have been some of the best months of my entire life and I couldn’t be any more grateful. My time in Costa Rica will always be something I look back on with joy and good memories – and not just good memories, but the best ones. And even through the hard times, I was still by some mystery having fun… another thing that having good community does! Costa Rica was such a good way to start out the race and I couldn’t be any more happy with where I am right now – and it’s only the beginning!
* Head over and read my teammate Mack’s blog about vulnerability and consider donating to her! Also, my man Moncho in our squad needs donations to stay out on the field – that man is changing lives and he means the world to us! Consider donating to him as well. Thank you for all the prayers/donations! God is so good!!
